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Band 7+: The bar chart below shows the percentages of New Zealand smokers in the age group 18 - 25 years, for the period 2014 - 2018. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

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Image for topic: The bar chart below shows the percentages of New Zealand smokers in the age group 18 - 25 years, for the period 2014 - 2018. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

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The image shows percentages of New Zealand smokers aged 18-25 related to three tobacco products from 2014-2018: for E-cigarettes, 2014 - 1%, 2015 - 3%, 2016 - 7%, 2017 - 12%, 2018 - 16%; for Cigarettes, 2014 - 15%, 2015 - 17%, 2016 - 16%, 2017 - 15%, 2018 - 14%; for Cigars, 2014 - 3%, 2015 - 4%, 2016 - 5%, 2017 - 6%, 2018 - 5%.

Given the complexity of the image, the above description may not be entirely accurate.

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Note: Both the topic and the answer were created by one of our users.

The given bar graph illustrates the percentage of smokers, aged between 18-25, using e-cigarettes, cigarettes, and cigars for the period 2014-2018 in New Zealand.

Overall, use of e-cigarettes increased significantly, while cigarettes use fell, and cigars stabilized.

For the first three years of given time period, e-cigarette use increased uniformly from 2.5% to 5%, and cigarette use declined uniformly from almost 17% to around 14%. However, cigar use did not undergo various changes; it was around 5% of adult smokers in 2014, rose about 1% in 2015, and then slightly fell to almost 6%.

In the next two years, 2017 and 2018, e-cigarette use surged dramatically; in the former year it was almost 15%, followed by around 17% in the next year. Similarly, cigarette use experienced a small jump from 10% to about 11%. However, the opposite trend was observed in cigar use, which shrank from more than 10% to 7% in these years.

Word Count: 154

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Overall Band Score

(+/- 0.5)

Vocabulary Complexity:
B2 - Upper Intermediate
Opt for even more advanced words when appropriate.

Grammar Mistakes: N/A

Vocabulary Repetition:

years: 3

almost: 3

around: 3

Try using synonyms for the above words

Task Response

The report covers the main trends in the graph, noting the significant increase in e-cigarette use, the decline in cigarette use, and the relative stability of cigar use. However, there are some inaccuracies in the data reported, particularly in the third paragraph. For example, the report states that e-cigarette use increased uniformly from 2.5% to 5% in the first three years, but the actual figures are 1%, 3%, and 7%. Similarly, the report mentions cigarette use declining from almost 17% to around 14%, but the actual figures are 15%, 17%, and 16%. Also, the percentages mentioned in the last paragraph are inaccurate. To improve, ensure that the data cited is accurate and reflects the information presented in the graph.

Coherence & Cohesion

The report is generally well-organized with a clear overview and body paragraphs. However, the transitions between some sentences and ideas could be smoother. For instance, in the third paragraph, the shift from the first three years to specific changes in cigar use feels a bit abrupt. Consider using transition words or phrases to connect ideas more explicitly. Also, ensure that each paragraph focuses on a single, clear aspect of the data to improve coherence.

Lexical Resource

The report demonstrates a good range of vocabulary, but there's room for improvement in using more precise and varied language to describe trends and quantities. For example, instead of repeatedly using 'increased' or 'decreased,' try synonyms like 'rose,' 'grew,' 'declined,' or 'diminished.' Also, consider using more specific quantifiers instead of approximations like 'around' or 'almost' when the data allows for it. This will enhance the sophistication of your lexical choices.

Grammatical Range & Accuracy

The report demonstrates a reasonable command of grammar, but there are some inaccuracies and awkward phrasings that affect clarity. For example, 'cigarette use declined uniformly from almost 17% to around 14%' could be phrased more precisely. Also, the sentence 'However, the opposite trend was observed in cigar use, which shrank from more than 10% to 7% in these years' contains inaccurate data and awkward phrasing. Proofread carefully to identify and correct these errors.

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