Bar Chart

Band 5+: the chart below gives information on average weekly spendings by families

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The image presents a bar chart on the average weekly spending by families for 1968 and 2018, measured as a percentage of weekly income. In 1968, spending was: Food 35%, Housing 10%, Fuel and power 6%, Clothing and footware 10%, Household goods 8%, Personal goods 7%, Transport 8%, and Leisure 9%. In 2018, the figures were: Food 17%, Housing 19%, Fuel and power 4%, Clothing and footware 5%, Household goods 6%, Personal goods 4%, Transport 14%, and Leisure 22%.

Given the complexity of the image, the above description may not be entirely accurate.

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The bar chart illustrates how families in one nation spend their weekely income in the year 1968 and 2018.

Overall, food accounted for the largest expenditure of income in 1968. However, Leisure makes the largest share of expenditure in the 2018. Expenditure on housing also increased. Meanwhile, fuel and power, Clothing and footware, transport, personal goods goes declined.

In 1968, expenditure on food makes the largest share by 35% in 1968. Similarly, housing accounted for the largest expenditure by families with 10% in the year intial year. Meanwhile, clothing and footware makes around 10% which is just equal with the housing. Likewise, household goods and personal goods with 9% and transport almost with the 8% and fuel and power accounted for the least proportion of expenditure around 5% respectively.

In 2018, the pattern has changed considerably where, leisure accounted for the largest expenditure at 22% followed by housing with 19%. Moreover, transport also increased significantly from 9% to 14%. Fuel and power, personal goods was decreased slightly over the period by 2% in both item in 2018. Similarly, food and clothing and footware also goes decreased and reach 23% and 5%. Household goods changed only slightly decreasing to around 6%.

Word Count: 200

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Overall Band Score

(+/- 0.5)

Vocabulary Complexity:
B2 - Upper Intermediate
Opt for even more advanced words when appropriate.

Grammar Mistakes: N/A

Vocabulary Repetition:

expenditure: 7

largest: 5

goods: 5

accounted: 4

housing: 4

makes: 3

power: 3

clothing: 3

footware: 3

transport: 3

personal: 3

around: 3

Try using synonyms for the above words

Task Response

The report addresses the task and presents an overall trend, but it contains several inaccuracies and omissions. For example, the figures for food in 2018 are incorrectly stated as 23% instead of 17%, and transport is said to have increased from 9% to 14%, but the initial figure should be 8%. Additionally, the report omits the exact percentage for personal goods in 1968 (7%) and misstates the fuel and power figure as 'around 5%' instead of 6%. The structure is generally clear, but some sentences are awkward or unclear (e.g., 'goes declined'). To improve, ensure accurate data reporting and use more precise language to describe changes.

Coherence & Cohesion

The report has a clear overall structure with an introduction, an overview, and two body paragraphs. However, the flow is sometimes disrupted by awkward phrasing and unclear referencing (e.g., 'in the year intial year', 'goes declined'). The overview is present but could be more concise and better integrated. Paragraphing is attempted but the second body paragraph mixes trends and specific data in a way that reduces clarity. To improve, use clear topic sentences and ensure each paragraph focuses on a distinct set of information, with smooth transitions between ideas.

Lexical Resource

The report uses some appropriate vocabulary for describing data (e.g., 'accounted for', 'expenditure', 'increased significantly', 'decreased slightly'). However, there are frequent inaccuracies and repetitions (e.g., 'makes the largest share', 'goes declined', 'intial year'). The range of vocabulary is limited, and some word choices are informal or incorrect. To improve, use a wider variety of precise terms (e.g., 'constituted', 'represented', 'experienced a decline') and ensure correct collocations (e.g., 'spending on' instead of 'expenditure of income').

Grammatical Range & Accuracy

The report contains numerous grammatical errors and punctuation issues that affect clarity. Examples include subject-verb agreement ('Leisure makes' should be 'Leisure made'), incorrect verb forms ('goes declined' should be 'declined'), and missing articles ('the year 1968' instead of 'the years 1968 and 2018'). There are also run-on sentences and awkward phrasing. To improve, focus on using a variety of sentence structures accurately, proofread for common errors, and ensure correct tense usage throughout the report.

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