Bar Chart

Band 7+: the chart below shows the changes in three different areas of crime in Manchester city centre from 2003 and 2012.

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Image for topic: the chart below shows the changes in three different areas of crime in Manchester city centre from 2003 and 2012.

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The image shows data from 2003 to 2012 for three crime categories in Manchester city center: Burglary occurrences were 3500 (2003), 3500 (2004), 3300 (2005), 3000 (2006), 2300 (2007), 2200 (2008), 1700 (2009), 1500 (2010), 1500 (2011), and 1300 (2012); Car Theft instances were 2700 (2003), 2700 (2004), 2000 (2005), 1900 (2006), 1700 (2007), 1600 (2008), 2200 (2009), 2500 (2010), 2600 (2011), and 2200 (2012); Robbery reports were virtually constant at around 500 each year from 2003 to 2012, with slight deviations peaking slightly above 500 in specific years.

Given the complexity of the image, the above description may not be entirely accurate.

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The line graph illustrates the variation in three types of crime in Manchester city centre between 2003 and 2012.

Overall, burglary initially recorded the highest crime figure; then it decreased sharply and remained at its lowest level over the period. Meanwhile, car theft in urban areas reported the second-highest number, and robbery witnessed the lowest rate throughout the period.

Looking at burglary, in 2003, it was the most popular crime in the urban city, starting at approximately 3,500 and peaking at around 3,800 in 2004 before declining sharply to hit a low of around 1100. Afterwards, it rebounded and stood at 1500 in 2009, after which it dipped again, reaching at 1500 in 2011 before decreasing to about 1400 by 2012.

The figure for car theft showed a moderate increase by the end of the period, which stood at around 2300 in 2003; then it decreased to reach its lowest point at about 2000 in 2000; after recovering, it peaked at 2800 by 2012. In contrast, robbery represented the lowest rate for the crime, increasing from 600 to around 900 between 2003 and 2005; after dropping slightly, it levelled off at about 550 until 2009, and then rebounded to approximately 600 by 2012.

Word Count: 203

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Overall Band Score

(+/- 0.5)

Vocabulary Complexity:
B2 - Upper Intermediate
Opt for even more advanced words when appropriate.

Grammar Mistakes: N/A

Vocabulary Repetition:

crime: 4

lowest: 4

around: 4

after: 3

about: 3

Try using synonyms for the above words

Task Response

The report addresses the task and provides an overview, but it contains several inaccuracies and inconsistencies in the data. For example, the peak for burglary is stated as 3,800 in 2004, but the data shows it remained at 3,500; the lowest point is given as 1,100, but the data shows 1,300; and the final value is 1,400, but the data shows 1,300. For car theft, the initial value is stated as 2,300, but the data shows 2,700; the lowest point is given as 2,000 in 2000, which is outside the period and incorrect; and the peak is stated as 2,800, but the data shows 2,700. Additionally, the robbery figures are described as increasing from 600 to 900, but the data indicates they were virtually constant at around 500. These inaccuracies detract from the task achievement. To improve, ensure that all data points are accurately reported and avoid inventing values not supported by the visual information. Also, maintain consistency in the time frame and avoid referencing years outside the given period.

Coherence & Cohesion

The report is logically organized with a clear introduction, overview, and body paragraphs. The use of cohesive devices is generally effective, but there are minor lapses in referencing and paragraphing. For example, the phrase 'it was the most popular crime in the urban city' could be more precise, and the transition between the two body paragraphs could be smoother. Ensure that each paragraph focuses on a clear set of data and that pronouns clearly refer to the intended nouns.

Lexical Resource

The report uses a good range of vocabulary appropriate for the task, such as 'illustrates,' 'declined sharply,' 'rebounded,' and 'levelled off.' However, there are some inaccuracies and less precise word choices, such as 'most popular crime' (better: 'most frequent crime') and 'urban city' (redundant). Additionally, the phrase 'in 2000' is clearly a typo and should be 'in 2008.' To improve, use more precise and varied vocabulary, and avoid repetition of 'around' and 'approximately.'

Grammatical Range & Accuracy

The report demonstrates a good range of grammatical structures, including complex sentences and appropriate use of tenses. However, there are several minor errors and awkward phrasings that affect clarity. For example, 'reaching at 1500' should be 'reaching 1500,' and 'which stood at around 2300 in 2003' is a dangling modifier. Also, the sentence 'after dropping slightly, it levelled off at about 550 until 2009' is clear, but the overall accuracy could be improved by proofreading for subject-verb agreement and preposition use. With careful editing, the grammatical accuracy can be enhanced.

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