Bar Chart

Band 6+: The chart below shows the expenditure of two countries on consumer goods in 2010. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

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Image for topic: The chart below shows the expenditure of two countries on consumer goods in 2010. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

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The image depicts the expenditures in 2010 by France and the UK on five consumer goods categories: Cars (France: ~400,000, UK: ~450,000), Computers (France: ~375,000, UK: ~350,000), Books (France: ~300,000, UK: ~400,000), Perfume (France: ~200,000, UK: ~150,000), Cameras (France: ~350,000, UK: ~350,000).

Given the complexity of the image, the above description may not be entirely accurate.

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The chart demonstrates the amount of resources spent on consumer items: cars, computers, books, perfume, cameras in France and the UK during the year 2010.

Overall, in France and in the UK the highest amount of money was spent on cars. Notably, both countries spent around the same on perfume in 2010.

In detail, the UK spent more money on three items: cars, books and cameras than France. In both countries, the highest amount of money was spent on cars compared to other goods, in France £400,000 and in the UK about £460,000. The UK spent about £110,000 more on books than France. Spending on cameras differed considerably between the two countries, with the UK spending around £370,000, whereas France spent about £150,000.

In contrast, consumers in France spent more resources on computers and perfume than the UK. Spending on computers was almost the same in both countries, in France around £370,000 and £350,000 in the UK. By comparison, expenditure on perfume was slightly higher in France, about £200,000 than in the UK approximately £190,000.

Word Count: 175

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Overall Band Score

6.5

(+/- 0.5)

Vocabulary Complexity:
A2 - Upper Beginner
Consider using more varied and advanced words.

Grammar Mistakes: N/A

Vocabulary Repetition:

france: 9

spent: 8

perfume: 4

countries: 4

about: 4

amount: 3

computers: 3

books: 3

cameras: 3

money: 3

around: 3

spending: 3

Try using synonyms for the above words

Task Response

The report adequately addresses the task, presenting the main features of the chart and making relevant comparisons. However, there are some inaccuracies in the data reported (e.g. spending on cameras and perfume). To improve, ensure greater accuracy in data reporting and consider a more structured approach to comparing and contrasting the data.

Coherence & Cohesion

The report is generally well-organized with a clear structure, including an introduction, overview, and detailed paragraphs. The information is presented logically, and the use of cohesive devices such as 'overall,' 'notably,' 'in detail,' 'in contrast,' and 'by comparison' helps to connect ideas. However, there are a few instances where the flow could be improved. For example, the transition between the second and third paragraphs could be smoother. Consider using more varied cohesive devices to enhance the overall flow.

Lexical Resource

The report demonstrates a good range of vocabulary related to the topic of expenditure and consumer goods. Terms like 'resources spent,' 'consumer items,' 'expenditure,' and 'considerably' are used appropriately. However, there is room for improvement in terms of lexical sophistication and precision. For instance, instead of repeatedly using 'amount of money spent,' try using synonyms like 'expenditure,' 'investment,' or 'capital outlay' to add variety and depth to the writing. Also, ensure that the figures quoted are as accurate as possible based on the visual. Pay attention to vocabulary repetition to improve the overall score.

Grammatical Range & Accuracy

The report demonstrates a reasonable command of grammar, with a mix of simple and complex sentences. However, there are some grammatical errors and inaccuracies that affect the clarity and precision of the writing. For example, there are discrepancies in the figures provided compared to the visual information. Ensure that all figures are accurate and consistent. Also, pay attention to subject-verb agreement and correct use of articles and prepositions. Proofreading carefully can help to eliminate these errors.

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