Process Diagram

Band 6+: The diagram below illustrates the process of producing soft cheese.

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Image for topic: The diagram below illustrates the process of producing soft cheese.

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The image shows a process diagram titled "Process for making soft cheese" with a legend defining four symbols: a bar for "Liquid to thick mixture", a diamond-topped icon for "mixer", a burner icon for "heat", and a small cylinder for "filter". The process flows left to right through connected containers: 1) Initial inputs of "water" and "milk" enter a container marked with "mixing" at the inlet and "mixing" inside with a mixer icon; 2) A pipe leads to a container labeled "cooling", containing a mixer icon, operated at "9°C" for "(2 hours)"; 3) "salt" is added into the connecting pipe leading to a container labeled "fermentation", containing a mixer icon, with heat below at "37°C" for "(6 hours)"; 4) The next container is labeled "evaporation" with "steam" rising from a valve, heated below at "100°C" for "(8 hours)"; 5) The pipe passes through a filter, with a branch draining "waste water" at the bottom; 6) The main pipe leads into a final tall container labeled "cooling" at top, containing "soft cheese", maintained at "5°C" for "(8 hours)".

Given the complexity of the image, the above description may not be entirely accurate.

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The diagram shows the stages involved in manufacturing soft cheese from row materials like water and milk.

Overall, cheese production undergoes a series of stages until it becomes soft cheese, starting with mixing process and ending with the final cooking stage. In total, the entire procedure takes 24 hours to complete with a temperature ranging dramatically from 5C to 100C.

In the initial stage, water and milk send to the mixer in order to combine them together to form a thick mixture. This mixture subsequently transferred to cooling machine, where it is kept at a temperature of 9C for a period of two hours. Afterwards, salt is introduced and send to fermentation tank for six hours at a temperature of 37C.

Following this, fermented material is then transferred to an evaporation tank, which is in 100C and evaporate for 6 hours with mixing the substance. At the end, evaporated milk is filtered through cooling tank. After eight hours at a temperature of 5C the substance become ready for consumption, while any leftover waste water is drained away.

Word Count: 177

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Overall Band Score

(+/- 0.5)

Vocabulary Complexity:
C1 - Intricate
Strive to incorporate even richer and more precise language.

Grammar Mistakes: N/A

Vocabulary Repetition:

hours: 5

temperature: 4

cheese: 3

water: 3

Try using synonyms for the above words

Task Response

The report provides a clear and logical overview of the cheese-making process, covering all main stages from initial mixing to final cooling. The overall structure is appropriate, with an introduction, an overview, and detailed paragraphs. However, there are a few inaccuracies and omissions: the evaporation stage is stated to last 6 hours instead of 8, and the final cooling stage is described as 'filtered through cooling tank' rather than being filtered before cooling. Additionally, some minor grammatical errors and informal phrasing (e.g., 'row materials', 'send to', 'become ready') slightly affect clarity. To improve, ensure all time durations and temperatures are accurately reported, and use more precise academic language.

Coherence & Cohesion

The report is logically organized and the overall process is clear. However, there are some issues with referencing and logical connections between stages, such as 'this mixture subsequently transferred' and 'fermented material is then transferred' could be more smoothly linked. The final sentence about 'evaporated milk is filtered through cooling tank' is a bit confusing and could be rephrased for better clarity. The paragraphing is adequate but could be improved by more explicit sequencing and clearer transitions.

Lexical Resource

The vocabulary used is generally appropriate for the task, with terms like 'manufacturing', 'fermentation', 'evaporation', and 'filtered' are used correctly. However, there are some inaccuracies such as 'row materials' instead of 'raw materials' and 'send' instead of 'sent' or 'sent to' in passive constructions. The range of vocabulary is adequate but not highly sophisticated, and some phrases are repetitive (e.g., 'mixing' and 'cooling' are used frequently).

Grammatical Range & Accuracy

The report uses a mix of simple and some complex structures, but there are several grammatical errors that affect accuracy. For example, 'water and milk send to the mixer' should be 'are sent to the mixer', 'this mixture subsequently transferred' should be 'is subsequently transferred', and 'which is in 100C' should be 'which is at 100°C'. Also, 'evaporate for 6 hours' is incorrect as the diagram says 8 hours, but that is a content issue. Punctuation is mostly correct, but the errors in verb forms and prepositions reduce the overall accuracy.

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