Process Diagram

Band 7+: The diagram below shows how honey is made in small-scale commercial production. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

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Image for topic: The diagram below shows how honey is made in small-scale commercial production. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

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The image depicts the small-scale commercial honey production process, beginning with the bee phase that includes gathering nectar, depositing honey, drying honey, keeping cells clean, and sealing cells with wax. In the human phase, the worker gathers honeycombs, presses combs, extracts honey, heats honey to 45-50°C in the sump tank, filters it through a sieve tank to remove dirt, and deposits honey in the settling tank for 24 days before selling.

Given the complexity of the image, the above description may not be entirely accurate.

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Note: Both the topic and the answer were created by one of our users.

The diagram illustrates stages involved in a honey making process in a small-scale commercial manufacturing.

Overall, this process consists of two main phases, including bee works and human interference, before being sealed and distributed to the market.

Regarding the first phase, to start creating honey, bees have to gather nectar from flowers, transporting to a special cage which is used for depositing honey. Inside this, honey, which is placed in thousands of hexagons, is dried by bees whose wings are fanning constantly. Moreover, the bees also need to keep cells hygiene by sealing them with wax, allowing honey to get ready for the following stages.

Turning to the human phase, after being fulfilled by bees, these honeycombs are collected manually before being poured into a machine to begin being pressed. Subsequently, honey is poured into a sump tank which is maintained at 45-50 Celsius degrees before infusing into a sieve tank. This tank functions as removing dirt and other impurities before allowing honey to rest in another tank for a 2-to-4-day period. Finally, honey is then labelled and sealed in glass jars before being distributed to the market by trucks.

Word Count: 190

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Overall Band Score

(+/- 0.5)

Vocabulary Complexity:
C1 - Intricate
Strive to incorporate even richer and more precise language.

Grammar Mistakes: N/A

Vocabulary Repetition:

honey: 8

before: 5

being: 5

which: 3

Try using synonyms for the above words

Task Response

The report provides a clear and comprehensive overview of the process, effectively dividing the information into the biological and human stages. The main features are well-identified, and the progression of steps is logical. To improve, ensure more precise word choices (e.g., 'human interference' has a negative connotation; 'human intervention' or 'human involvement' would be more appropriate) and check for minor grammatical accuracy in complex sentences. The summary of the settling period was slightly different from the visual description, but the overall coverage is sufficient for a high score.

Coherence & Cohesion

The report is logically organized into clear stages, moving from the biological process to the human processing phase. The use of cohesive devices such as 'Regarding the first phase', 'Turning to the human phase', and 'Subsequently' helps the reader follow the sequence. However, some transitions could be smoother. For instance, the phrase 'after being fulfilled by bees' is slightly awkward in this context. To improve, ensure that the connection between sentences feels more natural rather than just using a list of sequential markers.

Lexical Resource

The vocabulary is generally appropriate and covers the necessary steps of the process. You have used some good descriptive terms like 'hexagons', 'impurities', and 'distributed'. However, there are some instances of imprecise word choices, such as 'human interference' (which carries a negative connotation) instead of 'human intervention' or 'human processing', and 'keep cells hygiene' instead of 'maintain cell hygiene'. Aim for more precise collocations to reach a higher band.

Grammatical Range & Accuracy

The report demonstrates a mix of simple and complex sentence structures, such as the use of relative clauses ('which is used for...', 'whose wings are...'). However, there are several grammatical inaccuracies that affect the flow. For example, 'transporting to a special cage' lacks a subject or proper passive construction, and 'This tank functions as removing dirt' is grammatically incorrect (it should be 'This tank functions to remove dirt' or 'This tank serves the purpose of removing dirt'). Pay closer attention to subject-verb agreement and the correct use of gerunds and infinitives.

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Band 7+: The diagram below shows how honey is made in small-scale commercial production. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

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Overall Band Score

Task Response

Coherence & Cohesion

Lexical Resource

Grammatical Range & Accuracy

Answers On The Same Topic:

The diagram below shows how honey is made in small-scale commercial production. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

The diagram below shows how honey is made in small-scale commercial production. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

The diagram below shows how honey is made in small-scale commercial production. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

The diagram below shows how honey is made in small-scale commercial production. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

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