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Letter

Band 5+: You live in an english speaking country and you want to do some voluntary and unpaid work in a dveloping country. Write a letter to a company called Cultural expeditions, which organizes such trips. In your letter: - Indicate where you would like to volunteer and for how long - Explain why you want to do voluntary work - State what your skills and experience are

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Note: Both the topic and the answer were created by one of our users.

Dear Ms Pasquale,

I hope this email finds you well. I am Bansari Patel, living here in Toronto for a decade. Recently, I have seen advertisements for your company, Cultural Expeditions, which organizes the trips for volunteers who are interested in working to help growing nations in aspects of education, technology, preserving culture or environment, etc.

While India is one of the fastest developing countries, there are several remote locations where technology has not knocked yet. I know about one countryside place called Spiti Valley, which is indeed a beautiful location full of nature. However, residents of this area lack educational facilities as well as digital advancement. I would like to ask if your company can organize a 4-week trip there where we can conduct some seminars and present some practical demos on these topics. It would be the greatest contribution ever. I would like to put my efforts into making them evolve and shine in their lives.

Since I am a software developer, I have hands-on experience with technologies and smart devices such as computers and could demonstrate in order to spread awareness of the digital world in such an area.

Looking forward to hearing from you regarding such an opportunity.

Thanking You

Yours, Sincerely

Bansari PAtel

Word Count: 208

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Overall Band Score

5.5

(+/- 0.5)

Vocabulary Complexity:
C1 - Intricate
Strive to incorporate even richer and more precise language.

Grammar Mistakes: N/A

Vocabulary Repetition:

would: 3

Try using synonyms for the above words

Task Response

6.5

The letter adequately addresses all parts of the task. The location, duration, reasons, and skills are clearly stated. Minor improvements in clarity and precision could elevate the response.

Coherence & Cohesion

5.5

The letter's structure is logical, but the flow could be smoother. Some sentences lack a strong connection to the preceding ones, impacting the overall coherence.

Lexical Resource

6

The vocabulary used is appropriate and mostly accurate. While the range is sufficient, incorporating more sophisticated vocabulary would enhance the letter's impact.

Grammatical Range & Accuracy

4

The letter contains several grammatical errors that affect the overall clarity and fluency. Improving grammatical accuracy is crucial for a higher score.

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