Opinion

Band 6+: The best way to provide enough homes in large cities is to build tall apartment blocks. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this statement?

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Nowadays, it is often argued that high-rise buildings can solve the problem of housing shortage and give a chance for citizens to buy affordable apartments. I completely agree with this statement, because tall buildings can help governments economise on land use, whereas residents can stop worrying about their place of residence.

Firstly, one of the main reasons why I believe this is true is that building large high-rise apartment blocks could save more territory, which, in addition, could be a great opportunity for authority to construct new useful places such as medical and entertaniment centres, schools, shops, museums, libraries. For instance, there are a lot of huge high-rise buildings or Penthouses in New York city, because that city does not have enough space to accommodate detached houses, that is why city leaders decide to use space sparingly. As a result, building tall apartment vertical blocks could be more efficient to save ground for authority of urban areas.

Secondly, another crucial point is that either old or new citizens could get rid of anxiety about housing shortage, because there are more affordable housing with high-rise buildings in a large city. This means that, if a new resident decides to move to an urban city, he will always get a chance to find an accommodation, which is really beneficial. Therefore, building high-rise appartments can assist citizens to purchase an affordable permanent place of residence. Moreover, life in this type of apartment, which are usually located in city centres, can deliver a significantly improved quality of life.

In conclusion, I strongly believe that, constructing tall apartment blocks could not only help to save a huge piece of land, but also provide sufficient, affordable and comfortable housings.

Word Count: 283

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Overall Band Score

6.5

(+/- 0.5)

Vocabulary Complexity:
C2 - Complex
Continue to challenge and refine your language choices.

Grammar Mistakes: N/A

Vocabulary Repetition:

high-rise: 5

could: 5

buildings: 4

affordable: 4

apartment: 4

housing: 3

citizens: 3

because: 3

building: 3

blocks: 3

which: 3

Try using synonyms for the above words

Task Response

The essay addresses all parts of the prompt and presents a clear, consistent position throughout. The ideas are relevant and well-developed, particularly the connection between vertical expansion and the preservation of land for public amenities. The use of New York as an example provides good support for the first main point. To reach a higher score, the development of the second point could be more nuanced; for instance, you could briefly acknowledge the potential counter-argument (such as the high cost of land in city centers making high-rises expensive) before reinforcing why they remain the best solution. Additionally, ensuring more precise vocabulary (e.g., using 'urban planning' instead of 'authority of urban areas') would enhance the academic tone.

Coherence & Cohesion

The essay is logically organized with a clear introduction, body paragraphs, and a conclusion. You use cohesive devices such as 'Firstly', 'Secondly', and 'In conclusion' effectively to guide the reader. However, some transitions within paragraphs could be smoother. For example, the connection between the New York example and the general principle could be more fluid. To improve, try to vary your linking words and ensure that each sentence flows naturally into the next without relying too heavily on standard transitional phrases.

Lexical Resource

You demonstrate a good range of vocabulary related to the topic, such as 'housing shortage', 'economise on land use', and 'accommodate'. There is some repetition of words like 'authority' and 'city'. To reach a higher band, aim for more sophisticated synonyms and ensure precise word choice. For instance, instead of 'useful places', you could use 'essential infrastructure' or 'public amenities'. Also, be careful with spelling errors like 'entertaniment' and 'appartments'. Pay attention to vocabulary repetition to improve the overall score.

Grammatical Range & Accuracy

You use a mix of simple and complex sentence structures, which is good. However, there are several grammatical inaccuracies that occasionally hinder the flow. Issues include subject-verb agreement (e.g., 'there are more affordable housing' should be 'there is more affordable housing'), pluralization errors (e.g., 'housings' is uncountable), and some awkward phrasing (e.g., 'apartment vertical blocks'). Focus on mastering countable and uncountable nouns and refining your use of relative clauses to ensure higher accuracy.

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Band 6+: The best way to provide enough homes in large cities is to build tall apartment blocks. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this statement?

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Overall Band Score

Task Response

Coherence & Cohesion

Lexical Resource

Grammatical Range & Accuracy

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