Letter

Band 7+: All new employees at your workplace have a mentor - an experienced colleague who gives them advice and support in their career. As a new employee, you have been given details of your mentor. Write a letter to introduce yourself to your new mentor. In your letter · give a brief outline of your previous studies and work experience · explain what help you hope your mentor can give · suggest arrangements for a first meeting with your mentor

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Dear Mr. Safa,

I hope you are doing well. My name is Nilufa Yasmin, and I have recently joined your company. I am writing this letter to introduce myself and to discuss how we can work together as mentor and mentee.

I have completed my Degree in Accounting. During my studies, I learned about financial management, business operation and basic accounting principles. I also have some experience teaching English an institute. This experience has helped me improve my communication and interpersonal skills.

As a new employee, I hope you can guide me understanding the working environment and company policies. I would also appreciate your advice improving my professional skills, managing responsibilities and developing my career.

I would like to suggest have our first meeting next Monday at 10:00 a.m. in the office meeting room. However, I am happy to adjust the time according to your availability.

I look forward to meeting you and learning from your valuable experience.

Yours sincerely

Nilufa Yesmin

Word Count: 162

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Overall Band Score

(+/- 0.5)

Vocabulary Complexity:
C1 - Intricate
Strive to incorporate even richer and more precise language.

Grammar Mistakes: N/A

Vocabulary Repetition:

meeting: 3

Try using synonyms for the above words

Task Response

The letter covers all three bullet points: it provides a brief outline of studies and work experience, explains the help needed from the mentor, and suggests arrangements for a first meeting. The tone is appropriate and the letter is generally well-organized. However, there are a few minor lapses: the phrase 'teaching English an institute' is missing a preposition, and 'guide me understanding' and 'advice improving' are slightly awkward. Also, the name at the end is spelled differently from the name in the body. To improve, ensure grammatical accuracy and consistency in spelling.

Coherence & Cohesion

The letter is logically organized and easy to follow, with clear paragraphing for each bullet point. However, some sentences are slightly awkward or lack smooth transitions, which occasionally draws attention to the cohesion. For example, 'I have completed my Degree in Accounting' could be more naturally phrased, and the transition from studies to work experience could be smoother. To improve, use a wider range of linking words and ensure each paragraph flows naturally into the next.

Lexical Resource

The vocabulary is appropriate and generally accurate, with some good choices such as 'mentor and mentee', 'interpersonal skills', and 'valuable experience'. However, there are a few imprecise or informal phrases, such as 'teaching English an institute' (missing 'at an') and 'guide me understanding' (should be 'guide me in understanding'). To achieve a higher score, aim for more sophisticated and precise vocabulary, and avoid minor errors that affect clarity.

Grammatical Range & Accuracy

The letter contains a mix of simple and complex structures, but there are several grammatical errors and awkward phrasings that affect accuracy. Examples include: 'teaching English an institute' (missing 'at'), 'guide me understanding' (should be 'guide me in understanding'), 'advice improving' (should be 'advice on improving'), and 'suggest have our first meeting' (should be 'suggest having our first meeting'). Additionally, the closing 'Yours sincerely' is appropriate, but the name is misspelled ('Yesmin' vs 'Yasmin'). To improve, proofread carefully and practice using correct prepositions and verb forms.

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