Bar Chart

Band 4+: The chart below shows the number of houses sold in 8 cities in the world for more than 5 Million US dollars in 2009 and 2014. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

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Image for topic: The chart below shows the number of houses sold in 8 cities in the world for more than 5 Million US dollars in 2009 and 2014. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

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The image has a bar chart comparing the number of houses sold for more than 5 Million US Dollars between 2009 and 2014 across various cities. Dubai had an increase from 12 houses in 2009 to 46 in 2014. Singapore went from 107 to 74, Sydney from 151 to 258, Los Angeles saw a rise from 178 to 214, Miami from 256 to 312, and Hong Kong from 388 to 596. New York's count in 2009 was 476 and rose to 796 in 2014. London had the highest numbers with 523 houses in 2009 and a significant jump to 1638 in 2014.

Given the complexity of the image, the above description may not be entirely accurate.

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Note: Both the topic and the answer were created by one of our users.

The bar chart illustrates the amount of the apartments which were merchandised more than 5 million dollar in several cities in two years 2009 and 2014.

Overall, London was dominated in both years through the way of sales while the lowest point of the house trading was in Dubai. However, other cities were also retailed enough in couple of years.

In 2009, Dubai was sold only 12 apartments which were about 5 million in total while in 2014 this numbers were increased minimally and sold 46 houses. However in Singapore the quantity of the traded houses 107 that merchandised about 200 million dollar in 2009 whereas in 2014, the number of apartment was declined slightly for 33. Syndey started it’s way with 151 houses in 2009 which were matketed for about 300 million dollar and then in 2014 amount of the sold houses rose for 107. Los Angeles and Miami sold 178 and 256 houses in 2009 for mor than 5 million and in 2014 went up for 26 and 57 respectively for about 400 million.

Hong Kong traded 388 apartments for 500 million dollar in 2009 while in 2014 merchandised 596 for about 750 million. In 2009, New York sold 476 accommodation while in 2014 this quantity increased sharply and had traded 796 houses. London domitated in the both year in trade of the houses more than 5 million and in 2009, it sold 523 houses for about 620 million. However, in 2014 this numbers rose 3 times and reached 1638 apartments which were merchandised for about 1,750 million.

Word Count: 260

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Overall Band Score

4.5

(+/- 0.5)

Vocabulary Complexity:
B1 - Intermediate
Using more sophisticated words could be beneficial.

Grammar Mistakes: N/A

Vocabulary Repetition:

million: 10

houses: 8

about: 7

apartments: 4

which: 4

merchandised: 4

dollar: 4

while: 4

however: 3

traded: 3

Try using synonyms for the above words

Task Response

The report attempts to address the task by mentioning all the cities and providing data for both years. However, there are significant issues with data interpretation and accuracy. The report frequently attempts to calculate total dollar amounts (e.g., 'about 200 million dollar') which are not provided in the visual description; the chart only shows the number of houses, not the total value of sales. This introduces irrelevant and speculative information. Additionally, some mathematical descriptions are confusing (e.g., saying a number 'declined slightly for 33' or 'rose for 107' instead of 'by'). To improve, focus strictly on the data provided (the count of houses) and avoid making assumptions about total monetary values. Ensure that comparisons are made clearly using appropriate prepositions like 'by' or 'to'.

Coherence & Cohesion

The report follows a logical structure with an introduction, overview, and body paragraphs. However, the cohesion is weakened by repetitive sentence structures and a lack of sophisticated transition signals. Some sentences are overly long and run-on, which makes it difficult for the reader to follow the comparison between cities. To improve, try using more varied linking words (e.g., 'In contrast,' 'Similarly,' 'Conversely') and ensure that each sentence focuses on a clear, singular idea.

Lexical Resource

The vocabulary used is often inappropriate for an academic report. Words like 'merchandised', 'retailed', 'marketed', and 'accommodation' are used incorrectly in the context of real estate sales. There is also a tendency to repeat the same words or use them in unnatural ways. Focus on learning specific collocations for data description, such as 'the number of houses sold,' 'the volume of sales,' or 'the figure for.' Avoid using commercial terms like 'merchandised' when describing statistical trends. Boost vocabulary complexity to elevate the overall score.

Grammatical Range & Accuracy

There are frequent grammatical errors that impact the clarity of the report. Issues include subject-verb agreement (e.g., 'this numbers were'), incorrect preposition usage (e.g., 'declined slightly for 33' instead of 'by 33'), and awkward phrasing (e.g., 'London was dominated'). There is also a confusion between 'amount' (uncountable) and 'number' (countable). To improve, practice using comparative structures and ensure that your verb tenses are consistent and correctly applied to the data being described.

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