Bar Chart

Band 5+: The chart below shows the percentage of boys and girls in one country who played various sports in 2010

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The image depicts a bar chart detailing the participation rates for boys and girls in six different sports in 2010. Swimming had the highest participation for boys at close to 23% and for girls at nearly 20%. Football saw around 17% boys and 15% girls, Netball had fewer than 5% boys and approximately 12.5% girls. Tennis had about 10% for both genders, Basketball had close to 7% boys and less than 5% girls, and Cricket had roughly 15% boys and fewer than 5% girls.

Given the complexity of the image, the above description may not be entirely accurate.

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The chart gives information about the percentage of males and females in one country who played various sports.

The percent of boys who was swimming was 13%, when the boys who played football had the biggest percent 20%. But the sport whuch had the least percant was netball only 1%. Tennis and Basketball had close percentage, tennis was around 8% and basketball around 7%. And Cricket had same percent wiyh swimming 13%.

The girls who was in swimming sport was more than boys, it was 16% and the percentage of football was only 3%.The netball had the highest percent around girls 17%. Cricket had the least percant only 1%. Other sports tennis and basketball had close percentage, tennis had 7%, basketball had 6%.

Owerall, in 2010 the sport which was popular around boys was football the percent was 20%, when the popular sport around girls was netball and the percentage was 17%.

Word Count: 152

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Overall Band Score

(+/- 0.5)

Vocabulary Complexity:
A2 - Upper Beginner
Consider using more varied and advanced words.

Grammar Mistakes: N/A

Vocabulary Repetition:

percentage: 5

percent: 5

around: 5

sport: 4

tennis: 4

basketball: 4

swimming: 3

football: 3

netball: 3

girls: 3

Try using synonyms for the above words

Task Response

The report attempts to describe the data but contains significant inaccuracies and omissions. The organization is present but could be improved by grouping sports by gender or participation level. The report needs to accurately represent the data from the chart and avoid misrepresenting the percentages. To improve, focus on accurately extracting and reporting the key data points from the chart, and ensure that the overall trends and specific values are correctly represented.

Coherence & Cohesion

The report lacks clear organization and transitions between ideas. The information is presented in a somewhat disjointed manner, making it difficult to follow the main trends and comparisons. Paragraphing could be improved to group related information together. For example, you could dedicate a paragraph to comparing and contrasting the participation rates of boys and girls in each sport, or to highlighting the sports with the highest and lowest participation rates for each gender. Using cohesive devices such as 'in contrast,' 'similarly,' and 'overall' more effectively would also enhance the flow of the report.

Lexical Resource

The vocabulary used is basic and repetitive. There is a reliance on simple words like 'percent' and 'sport.' To improve, try to incorporate a wider range of vocabulary related to sports participation and data analysis. For example, instead of repeatedly using 'percent,' you could use 'proportion,' 'percentage,' or 'rate.' Instead of 'sport,' you could use 'activity' or 'discipline.' Also, try to use more precise language to describe the data, such as 'significantly higher,' 'slightly lower,' or 'approximately equal.' Boost vocabulary complexity to elevate the overall score.

Grammatical Range & Accuracy

The report contains numerous grammatical errors, including incorrect verb tenses ('was swimming' instead of 'swam'), subject-verb agreement issues ('boys who was swimming'), and incorrect word usage ('wiyh' instead of 'with,' 'percant' instead of 'percent'). Sentence structure is also often awkward and unclear. To improve, focus on mastering basic grammar rules and sentence structures. Proofread carefully for errors in verb tense, subject-verb agreement, and word choice. Consider using a grammar checker to identify and correct errors, but be sure to review the suggestions critically to ensure they are accurate.

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Band 5+: The chart below shows the percentage of boys and girls in one country who played various sports in 2010

Check Your Answer On This Topic?

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Overall Band Score

Task Response

Coherence & Cohesion

Lexical Resource

Grammatical Range & Accuracy

Answers On The Same Topic:

The chart below shows the percentage of boys and girls in one country who played various sports in 2010

The chart below shows the percentage of boys and girls in one country who played various sports in 2010

The chart below shows the percentage of boys and girls in one country who played various sports in 2010

The chart below shows the percentage of boys and girls in one country who played various sports in 2010

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the bar chart shows the number of cars per 1000 people in 5 European countries in 3 years and compares with the European average.

the bar chart shows the number of cars per 1000 people in 5 European countries in 3 years and compares with the European average.

Check Your Answer On This Topic?

Generate A Band-9 Sample Answer?

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Task Response

Coherence & Cohesion

Lexical Resource

Grammatical Range & Accuracy

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