Line Graph

Band 5+: The graph below gives information about the percentage of people living in Australia who were born in Asia, the UK, and other regions.

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Image for topic: The graph below gives information about the percentage of people living in Australia who were born in Asia, the UK, and other regions.

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The image displays a line graph with four lines representing TOTAL, UK, OTHER, and ASIA over the years 1976, 1981, 1986, 1991, 1996, 2001, 2006, and 2011. The TOTAL line starts at approximately 5% in 1976, rises to about 10% by 1986, and continues to increase to approximately 11% in 1991, approximately 14% in 2001, and reaching around 22% by 2011. The UK line starts around 7% in 1976, drops to just under 5% by 1986, fluctuates up to around 9% by 1991, falls to about 6% in 2001, and then rises slightly to about 7% in 2011. The OTHER line starts from about 5% in 1976, rises to around 12% in 1986, peaks at around 17% in 1991, falls to about 14% in 1996, dropping further to about 9% in 2006 and rising slightly to around 11% in 2011. The ASIA line begins at around 2% in 1976, remains stable till 1981, then rises gradually to about 4% in 2006, and increases sharply to about 11% in 2011.

Given the complexity of the image, the above description may not be entirely accurate.

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Note: Both the topic and the answer were created by one of our users.

The line graph illustates the proportion of Australian people who came from different places in the world like Asia, the UK, and others from 1976 to 2011.

Overall, the percentage of Australian people who belonged to the total, Asia, and other regions showed a upward trend while the opposite trend occurred among British data during the period shown.

In 1976, the proportion of Australian residents who were born in the UK account for 14% whereas the lowest percentage belonged to that of Asia. In the beginning year, the percentage of Asian immigrating to the british was roughly 4% and then rose dramatically to 15%.

In contrast, the figure for people from UK was 14% and declined significantly to 5% in 2011.

In the starting year, there was a slight increase in the total proportion of foreign-born residents with 25% in 2011. Other regions also experienced a gradual increase, rising from around 6% in 1976 to 15% in 2011.

Word Count: 158

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Overall Band Score

5.5

(+/- 0.5)

Vocabulary Complexity:
B2 - Upper Intermediate
Opt for even more advanced words when appropriate.

Grammar Mistakes: N/A

Vocabulary Repetition:

proportion: 3

australian: 3

people: 3

percentage: 3

Try using synonyms for the above words

Task Response

The report addresses the task, but there are inaccuracies in the data reported and some issues with the organization and clarity. The overview is acceptable, but the body paragraphs contain some confusing statements and incorrect figures. To improve, focus on accurately representing the data from the graph and ensuring that the trends and figures you mention are correct. Also, pay attention to the logical flow of information within each paragraph.

Coherence & Cohesion

The report demonstrates an attempt to organize information, but the progression of ideas is not always clear. The 'Overall' paragraph is present, but the subsequent paragraphs lack clear topic sentences and transitions, making it difficult to follow the trends and comparisons being made. Paragraphing could be improved to group related information more logically. For example, you could group the trends for Asia and the UK in separate paragraphs to highlight their contrasting movements. Use cohesive devices more effectively to link ideas within and between paragraphs.

Lexical Resource

The report uses a limited range of vocabulary, with some inaccuracies in word choice ('British data,' 'British was roughly 4%'). There is repetition of words like 'percentage' and 'proportion.' To improve, try to use synonyms and a wider range of vocabulary to describe trends (e.g., 'increased substantially,' 'remained relatively stable,' 'fluctuated'). Pay attention to using the correct prepositions and collocations.

Grammatical Range & Accuracy

The report contains several grammatical errors that affect clarity. Examples include subject-verb agreement issues ('the proportion of Australian residents who were born in the UK account for 14%'), incorrect use of articles ('the british'), and awkward phrasing ('Asian immigrating to the british'). There are also issues with tense consistency and sentence structure. To improve, focus on using a variety of sentence structures accurately and proofread carefully for grammatical errors. Consider using a grammar checker to identify and correct mistakes.

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