Line Graph

Band 5+: The graph below shows the percentage of workers in 5 different European countries with a day or more absence from 1991 to 2001.

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Image for topic: The graph below shows the percentage of workers in 5 different European countries with a day or more absence from 1991 to 2001.

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The image shows a line graph depicting the percentage of workers with illness absence in five European countries from 1991 to 2001: Netherlands (Net), Sweden (Swe), France (Fra), UK, Germany (Ger). In 1991: Net 3.5, Swe 4.5, Fra 7, UK 2, Ger 5. In 1992: Net 4, Swe 4.5, Fra 6.5, UK 2, Ger 5. In 1993: Net 4, Swe 4.5, Fra 6.5, UK 2, Ger 4.5. In 1994: Net 5, Swe 4.5, Fra 5, UK 2, Ger 4.5. In 1995: Net 4, Swe 5, Fra 5, UK 2.5, Ger 4.5. In 1996: Net 4.5, Swe 5, Fra 5, UK 2.5, Ger 3.5. In 1997: Net 4, Swe 5, Fra 4.5, UK 2.5, Ger 3.5. In 1998: Net 4, Swe 4.5, Fra 4.5, UK 3, Ger 3. In 1999: Net 3.5, Swe 4.5, Fra 4.5, UK 3, Ger 4. In 2000: Net 3 5, Swe 5.5, Ger 5, UK 3, Ger 3.5. In 2001: Net 2.5, Swe 6.5, Fra 5, UK 3, Ger 3.5.

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The line chart illustrates the percentage of workers who show absence due to illness in 5 countries:Netherlands, Sweden,France,UK,and Germany between 1991 and 2001.

Overall, it can be seen that there is a visible increase in percentage of workers with illness absence of France and Netherlands,in contrast figure for Sweden faced with sharp decline throughout the period.Furthermore, figures for the UK and Germany remained broadly stable.

To begin with, figures for Netherlands started at 5% in 1991, fluctuated slightly in the subsequent years, and eventually dropped the low of around 4.5% in 1996, then slightly rose to 6% by the end of the period and represented the highest figure among all countries.Percentage of France also showed substantial growth, rising from 3% in 1991 to 5% in 2001.

In comprasion,Sweden experienced sharp decline started from 5% at the beginning, then dropped to 3% in 1998, slightly rise to approximately 3.5% in 1999 and showed decline to 3% by the end of the period.UK experienced frequent fluctations and maintained a steady level over the a decade.Germany remained relatively unchanged from beginning in 1991 to 2001.

Word Count: 182

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Overall Band Score

(+/- 0.5)

Vocabulary Complexity:
B2 - Upper Intermediate
Opt for even more advanced words when appropriate.

Grammar Mistakes: N/A

Vocabulary Repetition:

decline: 3

slightly: 3

Try using synonyms for the above words

Task Response

The report attempts to address the task but contains significant inaccuracies and misinterpretations of the data. The overall trend description is incorrect: it states that France and Netherlands increased, while the data shows France decreased and Netherlands fluctuated with a slight decline. Sweden is described as declining sharply, but it actually increased overall. The specific figures cited are often wrong (e.g., Netherlands starting at 5% instead of 3.5%, France starting at 3% instead of 7%). The report also omits key details, such as the UK's gradual increase and Germany's fluctuations. To improve, focus on accurately summarizing the main trends, ensure all data points are correctly referenced, and avoid making unsupported claims. Organize the response clearly, perhaps by grouping countries with similar trends, and use precise language to describe changes over time.

Coherence & Cohesion

The report has a clear overall structure with an introduction and an overview, but the body paragraphs lack clear organization and logical progression. The data is presented in a somewhat random order, and the use of cohesive devices is limited and sometimes inaccurate (e.g., 'in comprasion' is misspelled and not used effectively). The paragraphing is not skilfully managed, as the second paragraph mixes data for different countries without clear separation. To improve, group countries with similar trends together and use a range of linking words and phrases (e.g., 'in contrast', 'similarly', 'whereas') to show relationships between data points. Ensure each paragraph has a clear central idea and that the flow of information is easy to follow.

Lexical Resource

The report uses some appropriate vocabulary for describing trends (e.g., 'fluctuated', 'decline', 'stable', 'growth'), but the range is limited and there are several inaccuracies and awkward phrasings. For example, 'show absence due to illness' is not as natural as 'were absent due to illness', and 'faced with sharp decline' is not idiomatic. There are also spelling errors ('comprasion', 'fluctations') and incorrect word choices ('the low' should be 'a low'). To improve, expand your vocabulary for describing changes (e.g., 'plummeted', 'soared', 'levelled off', 'remained constant') and use precise, natural collocations. Proofread to eliminate spelling errors and ensure that the language is formal and academic.

Grammatical Range & Accuracy

The report contains a mix of simple and complex sentences, but there are several grammatical errors that affect clarity. For example, 'there is a visible increase in percentage of workers' should be 'there was a visible increase in the percentage of workers', and 'started at 5% in 1991' is incorrect according to the data (should be 3.5%). There are also issues with subject-verb agreement, tense consistency, and article usage. The report would benefit from using a wider range of grammatical structures, such as passive voice and more complex clauses, while ensuring accuracy. Proofread carefully to correct errors in verb tense (past tense is appropriate for a historical period), articles, and prepositions.

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