Line Graph

Band 5+: The line graph below shows spending on player transfers by four different English football teams from 1995 to 2015.

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Image for topic: The line graph below shows spending on player transfers by four different English football teams from 1995 to 2015.

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The image shows a line graph detailing spending on player transfers by four English football teams from 1995 to 2015. In 1995, Manchester City spent £0M, Manchester United £20M, Liverpool £10M, Arsenal £10M. By 2000, Manchester City £0M, Manchester United £30M, Liverpool £20M, Arsenal £20M. In 2005, Manchester City £10M, Manchester United £50M, Liverpool £40M, Arsenal £40M. For 2010, Manchester City £60M, Manchester United £60M, Liverpool £30M, Arsenal £50M. By 2015, Manchester City reached £150M, Manchester United £90M, Liverpool £70M, Arsenal £60M.

Given the complexity of the image, the above description may not be entirely accurate.

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The libe chart displays spending on football players transfers by Manchester City, Manchester Utd, Liverpool and Arsenal in the years 1995 and 2015.

Overall, All three had a dramatically surge, apart from Arsenal, which was remained stable.

The Manchester Utd was the biggest spender of pounds in 1995 with just nearly a third and increased consistently every year to araund approximately three quarters and then sharply rocked up to 160 millions of pounds. However, it was the highest both of years. Liverpool standed the second highest with approximately roughtly one quarter in 1995 by increasing year on year, so it could took place still the second million spender on player transfers in 2015.

The Manchester City was the lowest overall user at the start of the period at around 5 millions of pounds in the years 1955 and 2005, then rose significantly to became the third highest consumer with nearly 130 millions of pounds in 2015. Spending on transfers in Arsenal players pounds hovered between 25 and 20 millions throughout the entire period.

Word Count: 173

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Overall Band Score

5.5

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Vocabulary Complexity:
C1 - Intricate
Strive to incorporate even richer and more precise language.

Grammar Mistakes: N/A

Vocabulary Repetition:

pounds: 5

manchester: 4

millions: 4

transfers: 3

arsenal: 3

years: 3

highest: 3

Try using synonyms for the above words

Task Response

The report addresses the task but contains inaccuracies and some irrelevant information. The description of trends is not always clear, and there are issues with data accuracy. To improve, focus on providing more precise data and ensuring the trends are accurately represented. Also, pay attention to grammar and vocabulary to enhance clarity.

Coherence & Cohesion

The report's organization is somewhat unclear, and the progression of ideas is not always smooth. The introduction and overview could be more concise and focused. The body paragraphs lack clear topic sentences, making it difficult to follow the main points. Transitions between sentences and paragraphs are weak, resulting in a lack of cohesion. Consider using more explicit transition words and phrases to guide the reader through the information. For example, phrases like 'In contrast,' 'Similarly,' or 'By comparison' could improve the flow.

Lexical Resource

The report demonstrates a limited range of vocabulary, with some inaccuracies and inappropriate word choices. There is some repetition of words and phrases, which could be improved by using synonyms and more varied language. For example, instead of repeatedly using 'increased,' consider alternatives like 'rose,' 'grew,' or 'expanded.' The use of informal language, such as 'rocked up,' should be avoided in academic writing. Focus on using more precise and formal vocabulary to enhance the clarity and credibility of your report.

Grammatical Range & Accuracy

The report contains numerous grammatical errors, including incorrect verb tenses, subject-verb agreement issues, and errors in punctuation. Sentence structure is often awkward and unclear, making it difficult to understand the intended meaning. For example, the sentence 'The Manchester Utd was the biggest spender of pounds in 1995 with just nearly a third and increased consistently every year to araund approximately three quarters and then sharply rocked up to 160 millions of pounds' is grammatically incorrect and difficult to follow. To improve, focus on reviewing basic grammar rules and practicing sentence construction. Pay close attention to verb tenses, subject-verb agreement, and the correct use of articles and prepositions.

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