Line Graph

Band 5+: The line graph gives information about the number of participants in different activities from 2000 to 2020.

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The image depicts a line graph illustrating the number of participants in various activities from 2000 to 2020. Film club: starts at 65 in 2000, slightly fluctuates to reach 64 in 2020. Martial arts: starts at 10 in 2000, peaks at 15 in 2005, dips to 10 by 2020. Amateur dramatics: begins at 20 in 2000, rises steadily to 60 by 2020. Table tennis: starts at 40 in 2000, increases to 50 by 2020. Musical performances: begins at 5 in 2000, remains constant until 2010, then increases sharply to 20 by 2020.

Given the complexity of the image, the above description may not be entirely accurate.

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The line graph provides information on the number of participants in five activities including film club, martial arts, amateur dramatics, table tennis, and musical performance in Melbourne from 2000 to 2020. Overall, film club consistently remained the highest figure through out the period, whereas the number of participants in amateur dramatics dive sharply towards the end of the timeframe, making it is the least popular activity.

In 2000, the film club was the largest group, maintaining a relatively stable trend around 65 members until 2020. Martial arts started with around 35 participants and slightly fluctuated between 30-35 over time. In comparison, musical performances, which had no participant from 2000 to 2005, gradually gained interest before stood at nearly 20 members in 2020.

Amateur dramatics began at 25 members before increased slightly to almost 30 in 2025. After that, the number of participants dropped dramatically just below 10 members in the end of time. In contrast, table tennis, which started at almost 20 people from 2000 – 2010, consistently jumped to 50 members in 2020.

Word Count: 174

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Overall Band Score

(+/- 0.5)

Vocabulary Complexity:
C1 - Intricate
Strive to incorporate even richer and more precise language.

Grammar Mistakes: N/A

Vocabulary Repetition:

members: 5

participants: 4

number: 3

dramatics: 3

Try using synonyms for the above words

Task Response

The report attempts to address the task but contains significant inaccuracies in data reporting that contradict the provided visual description. For instance, the report describes amateur dramatics as the least popular activity due to a sharp decline, whereas the description indicates it was one of the most popular activities with steady growth. Similarly, the figures provided for martial arts and table tennis do not align with the trends described. To improve, ensure that the trends and numerical values described in the report accurately reflect the data presented in the graph. Focus on identifying the correct direction of change (increase vs. decrease) for each category.

Coherence & Cohesion

The report follows a logical structure with an introduction, overview, and body paragraphs. However, there are significant issues with the logical flow of information. The overview contains a major contradiction: it states that amateur dramatics became the least popular activity due to a sharp dive, but the body paragraph describes a different trend. Furthermore, the use of cohesive devices is somewhat repetitive, and the progression of ideas within paragraphs can be confusing due to inaccuracies in how trends are linked.

Lexical Resource

The vocabulary used is somewhat limited and occasionally used incorrectly. For example, 'dive sharply' and 'jumped to' are used to describe trends, but the phrasing is not always natural in an academic context. There are also issues with word forms and collocations (e.g., 'making it is the least popular'). To improve, try to use a wider variety of academic verbs for trends, such as 'fluctuated,' 'surged,' 'declined,' or 'plateaued,' and ensure they are used in the correct grammatical context.

Grammatical Range & Accuracy

The report demonstrates a mix of simple and complex sentence structures, but grammatical errors are frequent and occasionally impede clarity. Issues include subject-verb agreement, incorrect tense usage (e.g., 'before stood'), and awkward phrasing (e.g., 'making it is'). There are also errors in preposition usage and sentence construction. Focus on mastering complex sentence structures like relative clauses and participial phrases to ensure they are grammatically sound.

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