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Band 6+: THE MAP BELOW SHOWS THE CHANGES IN THE CITY OF NELSON IN RECENT TIMES

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The image displays two maps of Nelson, depicting changes from 2000 to the present: In 2000, the city center was bordered by a university, old market, port, and train station. Currently, the city sees several upgrades: a house of residence is added adjacent to the university, joined by a new shopping center nearby. The train station was relocated, and a bike rental scheme as well as a new bus station are introduced. The former location of the old market now hosts a restaurant. New additions also include an area designated for pedestrians only and the bars and clubs situated where the old port was positioned.

Given the complexity of the image, the above description may not be entirely accurate.

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The maps show changes in the city of Nelson in recent times.

Overall,We can see that the city has been expended, with significantly more facilities available to people compared with 2000. Firstly, the city of Nelson has been developed and built new places. For instance: hall of residence, new shop, restaurant , bars and clubs, etc.

In 2000, Nelson it is really small city. There was a university located in north, near forest, a train station to the west, and a old market in the southwest. A restaurant , bars and clubs have been added between the port and road for predestrians only and the old road(which can car drive) has been removed. As a result, making the area more attractive for leisure activities. The forest was cut down and a new shopping centre was built on its surface in north. The university and city centre remains in the same places. However, in centre has been bike rental schme. A hall of residence has been constructed next to univercity. In addition, a new covered market has been built in the southeast. The old market has been replaced by a new shop.

Thus the city of Nelson has become more modern with more shops and services added, while the old objects disappeared.

Word Count: 211

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Overall Band Score

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Vocabulary Complexity:
B1 - Intermediate
Using more sophisticated words could be beneficial.

Grammar Mistakes: N/A

Vocabulary Repetition:

nelson: 4

built: 3

market: 3

centre: 3

Try using synonyms for the above words

Task Response

The report addresses the task, but there are some inaccuracies and omissions. The organization is present but could be improved. The language is generally clear, but there are some grammatical errors and awkward phrasings. To improve, focus on providing more specific details and ensuring accuracy in describing the changes. Also, work on sentence structure and grammar for clearer communication.

Coherence & Cohesion

The report demonstrates an adequate attempt to organize information, but the structure could be improved for better flow. The overview is present but could be more impactful by summarizing the key changes more concisely. Transitions between paragraphs are somewhat abrupt, and the use of cohesive devices is not always effective. Consider using more varied and precise linking words to guide the reader through the changes. For example, instead of just 'Firstly,' try 'Initially' or 'To begin with.' Also, ensure each paragraph focuses on a distinct aspect of the changes to enhance clarity.

Lexical Resource

The vocabulary used is generally appropriate but lacks sophistication and precision. There is some repetition of words like 'new' and 'city,' which could be replaced with synonyms to demonstrate a wider range. For instance, instead of 'new shop,' consider 'modern retail outlet' or 'newly constructed shopping center.' Expanding your vocabulary and using more descriptive language will enhance the quality of your report. Boost vocabulary complexity to elevate the overall score.

Grammatical Range & Accuracy

The report contains several grammatical errors that affect clarity. There are issues with sentence structure, verb tense consistency, and article usage. For example, 'the city has been expended' should be 'the city has expanded,' and 'a old market' should be 'an old market.' Pay close attention to subject-verb agreement and correct use of articles. Proofreading carefully and focusing on sentence construction will improve grammatical accuracy.

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