Pie Chart

Band 5+: The pie charts below show the online sales for retail sectors in New Zealand in 2003 and 2013. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features and make comparisons where relevant. Write at least 150 words.

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Image for topic: The pie charts below show the online sales for retail sectors in New Zealand in 2003 and 2013. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features and make comparisons where relevant. Write at least 150 words.

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The image displays two pie charts comparing percentages: in 2003, Travel 36%, Film/Music 21%, Books 19%, Clothes 24%; in 2013, Travel 29%, Film/Music 33%, Books 22%, Clothes 16%.

Given the complexity of the image, the above description may not be entirely accurate.

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The pie charts illustrates the online sales for trade sectors in New Zealand in 2003 and 2013.

Overall, the largest indicator in 2003 was travel,while the smallest one was books, whereas in 2013 the highest amount of sales was films and music, when the smallest was the clothes.

Online sales in the travel were the most popular in 2003 which make up 36%, but in ten years the trades in this area decrease on 29%. Films and musics including clothes shows the average with 21% and 24% in 2003, whereas the percentage of the first one increase to 33% what shows that the movies and musics were the most popular and the second one go down with 16% what shows the smallest indicator in 2013. However, the smallest indicator in 2003 were sales in books area(19%), this amount increase to 22%.

Word Count: 141

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Overall Band Score

5.5

(+/- 0.5)

Vocabulary Complexity:
B1 - Intermediate
Using more sophisticated words could be beneficial.

Grammar Mistakes: N/A

Vocabulary Repetition:

sales: 4

smallest: 4

indicator: 3

shows: 3

Try using synonyms for the above words

Task Response

The report covers the main features of the pie charts and makes relevant comparisons between the two years. There is a clear overview and the key trends are identified. To improve, ensure that the data is completely accurate and that the language is precise. The report falls short of the required 150 words.

Coherence & Cohesion

The report presents a general overview and identifies some key trends, but the organization could be improved for better clarity. The flow of information is somewhat disjointed in the second paragraph. Consider using more explicit linking words and phrases to connect ideas and improve the overall coherence. For example, transitions like 'In contrast,' 'Similarly,' or 'Furthermore' could enhance the logical progression of your points. Also, ensure each paragraph focuses on a single main idea to improve paragraphing.

Lexical Resource

The vocabulary used is generally adequate for the task, but there's room for improvement in terms of precision and variety. While words like 'indicator' and 'amount' are used, consider incorporating more specific and sophisticated vocabulary related to sales and trends, such as 'proportion,' 'revenue,' 'growth,' or 'decline.' This would add depth to your description and demonstrate a broader lexical range. Boost vocabulary complexity to elevate the overall score.

Grammatical Range & Accuracy

The report contains several grammatical errors that affect clarity. Errors include subject-verb agreement issues ('charts illustrates'), incorrect word usage ('trades' instead of 'sales'), and awkward phrasing ('what shows that'). To improve, focus on proofreading carefully for these common errors. Pay attention to sentence structure and ensure that your sentences are grammatically sound. Using a variety of sentence structures would also enhance the overall quality of your writing.

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Band 5+: The pie charts below show the online sales for retail sectors in New Zealand in 2003 and 2013. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features and make comparisons where relevant. Write at least 150 words.

Check Your Answer On This Topic?

Generate A Band-9 Sample Answer?

Overall Band Score

Task Response

Coherence & Cohesion

Lexical Resource

Grammatical Range & Accuracy

Answers On The Same Topic:

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The pie charts below show the online sales for retail sectors in New Zealand in 2003 and 2013. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features and make comparisons where relevant. Write at least 150 words.

The pie charts below show the online sales for retail sectors in New Zealand in 2003 and 2013. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features and make comparisons where relevant. Write at least 150 words.

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