Pie Chart

Band 6+: The pie graphs below show the result of a survey of children's activities. The first graph shows the cultural and leisure activities that boys participate in, whereas the second graph shows the activities in which the girls participate.}

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Image for topic: The pie graphs below show the result of a survey of children's activities. The first graph shows the cultural and leisure activities that boys participate in, whereas the second graph shows the activities in which the girls participate.}

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The image consists of two pie charts comparing boys' and girls' cultural and leisure activities. Boys' activities include: Basketball 26%, Soccer 17%, Reading 2%, Computer Games 34%, Listening to Music 10%, Skateboarding 11%. Girls' activities include: Dancing 27%, Gymnastics 11%, Reading 21%, Computer Games 16%, Netball 15%, Listening to Music 10%.

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The two pie graphs show the result of a survey of cultural and leisure activities performed by boys and girls.

Overall, most activities done by boys and girls are computer games and dancing, however the least activity done by them is listening to music. This is similar in both graphs.

In the first chart, it displays the activities boys participate in. As per the data, most activities done by them are computer games, basketball, and soccer while the least significant are reading, listening to music and skateboarding.

On the other chart, it displays girls participation in cultural and leisure activities. The highest amount of girls performing activities are dancing, computer games, reading, and netball, though the least activity they conduct is gymnastics and listening to music.

If we view both of the charts, a similar activity they execute is listening to music.

Word Count: 142

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Overall Band Score

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Vocabulary Complexity:
C1 - Intricate
Strive to incorporate even richer and more precise language.

Grammar Mistakes: N/A

Vocabulary Repetition:

activities: 6

listening: 4

girls: 3

computer: 3

games: 3

least: 3

activity: 3

music: 3

Try using synonyms for the above words

Task Response

The report addresses the task but contains some inaccuracies and omissions. The overview is somewhat general and could be more specific. The body paragraphs present some data, but there are inaccuracies in the details provided. To improve, ensure that the data cited is accurate and that all key features are mentioned. Also, try to provide a more analytical overview that highlights the main differences and similarities between the two graphs. The report falls short of the required 150 words.

Coherence & Cohesion

The report demonstrates an adequate attempt to organize information, but the flow could be improved. The organization into paragraphs is present, but the transitions between them are not always smooth. The 'overall' statement is a good start, but the subsequent paragraphs could benefit from clearer topic sentences that guide the reader. Consider using cohesive devices more effectively to link ideas within and between paragraphs. For example, instead of stating 'On the other chart,' you could use a phrase that directly compares it to the boys' activities.

Lexical Resource

The vocabulary used is generally appropriate for the task, but there's room for improvement in terms of variety and precision. The report relies on basic vocabulary such as 'activities,' 'done,' and 'participate.' Try to incorporate more specific and descriptive language to enhance the impact and demonstrate a wider range of vocabulary. For instance, instead of 'most activities done by them are computer games,' you could say 'computer games constitute the largest proportion of boys' leisure activities.'

Grammatical Range & Accuracy

The report demonstrates a mix of simple and complex sentence structures, but grammatical errors are noticeable and impact clarity. There are issues with subject-verb agreement, article usage, and sentence construction. For example, 'the least activity done by them is listening to music' and 'The highest amount of girls performing activities are dancing' contain grammatical errors. Focus on proofreading carefully to identify and correct these errors. Also, pay attention to using a wider range of grammatical structures accurately to improve the overall quality of the writing.

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