Letter

Band 6+: You have a full time job and are also doing a part time evening course. You now find that you can not continue the course. Write a letter to your tutor. In your letter, describe the situation explain why you cannot continue at this time say what action you would like to take You should write at least 150 words.

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Dear Madam,

I regret to inform you that I will temporarily discontinue my evening programme for the reason that I have my day job.

It really saddens me that I have to give up an opportunity to study for now. However, I’m still keen to pursue my further study in the future. My manager assigned me as a team leader and required me to relocate for one year to another town which is five hours drive away from our city, in exchange of increase in compensation and enabling me to travel to abroad. Also, my company agreed to grant me a scholarship and promised me to fund all my expenses in school provided that I will still work for them after I graduated from my course. As a rookie in my profession, it is also a golden opportunity for me and to my family, as well, since I am the one who finance all the necessities of my parents. Furthermore, this will be a great addition in my experience for my curriculum vitae if I will be fortunate to go after greener pasture.

I know it sounds absurd that I have to choose my career over my academic advancement but it’s the choice I had to make. Therefore, I would also like to request for a consideration regarding my readmission on my programme after a year. I hope I will still have the chance to be your student again. I look forward hearing from you.

Yours faithfully,

Joreen

Word Count: 248

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Overall Band Score

(+/- 0.5)

Vocabulary Complexity:
B2 - Upper Intermediate
Opt for even more advanced words when appropriate.

Grammar Mistakes: N/A

Vocabulary Repetition:

still: 3

after: 3

Try using synonyms for the above words

Task Response

The letter fully addresses the task, clearly explaining the situation and providing a valid reason for discontinuing the course. The writer also takes the opportunity to express their desire to continue their studies in the future and requests consideration for readmission. However, the letter could be improved by providing more detail on the impact of the relocation on their studies and a clearer explanation of their future plans.

Coherence & Cohesion

6.5

The letter is well-structured and easy to follow, with each paragraph logically leading to the next. The writer uses cohesive devices effectively, such as transitional phrases and pronouns, to link their ideas. However, some sentences could be rephrased for better clarity, and the writer could use more varied and sophisticated cohesive devices to enhance the overall coherence of the letter.

Lexical Resource

5.5

The writer demonstrates a good range of vocabulary, using phrases such as 'golden opportunity', 'curriculum vitae', and 'greener pasture'. However, there are some instances of word repetition and limited use of idiomatic language. The writer could improve by using more precise and nuanced vocabulary to convey their ideas.

Grammatical Range & Accuracy

5.5

The writer demonstrates a good range of sentence structures, including complex sentences and subordinate clauses. However, there are some minor errors in grammar and punctuation, such as missing articles and incorrect verb tenses. The writer could improve by proofreading their work more carefully to eliminate these errors.

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