Opinion

Band 5+: Although more and more people read news on the internet, newspapers will remain the most important source of news . To what extends do you agree or disagree ? Give reason for your answers and include relevant examples from your own experiences and knowledge. Write at least 250 words

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It is often argued that although many people obtain information from online news platforms via internet, traditional newspapers will remain the most crucial source of news. I disagree with the given view because digital media is faster and more convenient.

Firstly, online news platforms provide breaking news immediately via internet, which is easily accessible by people. People can get all updates about their country, or any other important information or news within seconds. While on the other hand, printed newspapers take time to gather all information, print information, and distribute it to all humans. For example, during the COVID-19 pandemic, people could receive immediate updates about the spread of the virus through the internet. This helped them take precautions and prepare for the situation. Therefore, digital media is so useful to get important news quickly.

Secondly, newspapers have some downsides, and these downsides were not as prominent earlier as now. the first downside is news cannot be accessed anywhere and anytime via internet, new platforms we can access it. A second downside is need to buy newspaper or carry it everywhere, in the other hand by mobile phone and internet we can access it by zero cost. Consequently, using online news platforms we can use less and less paper to make newspapers. And if we used less paper then fewer trees cut down, and because of that people can also protect environment.

In conclusion, I disagree with the given statement that traditional newspapers will remain the most important source of news. In my view, digital news is fast, instant, convenient and easy to accessible.

Word Count: 264

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Overall Band Score

5.5

(+/- 0.5)

Vocabulary Complexity:
C2 - Complex
Continue to challenge and refine your language choices.

Grammar Mistakes: N/A

Vocabulary Repetition:

people: 5

internet: 5

newspapers: 5

information: 4

platforms: 4

online: 3

digital: 3

other: 3

important: 3

Try using synonyms for the above words

Task Response

The essay addresses the prompt and presents a clear position of disagreement. The main ideas are relevant and supported with examples, such as the COVID-19 pandemic. However, there are some lapses in clarity and precision, particularly in the second body paragraph where the argument about downsides of newspapers is not fully developed and contains grammatical errors. To improve, focus on developing each point more fully and ensuring grammatical accuracy. Additionally, consider addressing the counterargument more explicitly to strengthen the response.

Coherence & Cohesion

The essay has a clear structure with an introduction, body paragraphs, and a conclusion. However, the flow is sometimes disrupted by awkward phrasing and unclear pronoun references. For example, in the second paragraph, the sentence 'the first downside is news cannot be accessed anywhere and anytime via internet, new platforms we can access it' is confusing and lacks clarity. Additionally, the transition between ideas could be smoother. To improve, use more cohesive devices such as 'firstly', 'secondly', 'moreover', and ensure each paragraph has a clear topic sentence and supporting details that logically connect.

Lexical Resource

The essay uses a range of vocabulary related to the topic, such as 'breaking news', 'digital media', 'precautions', and 'downsides'. However, there are some inaccuracies and awkward word choices, e.g., 'via internet' should be 'via the internet', and 'easy to accessible' should be 'easy to access'. The phrase 'all humans' is unnatural; 'people' would be better. To improve, focus on using more precise and natural collocations, and avoid repetition. Also, ensure that vocabulary is used accurately in context. Pay attention to vocabulary repetition to improve the overall score.

Grammatical Range & Accuracy

The essay contains several grammatical errors that affect clarity. For example, 'the first downside is news cannot be accessed anywhere and anytime via internet, new platforms we can access it' is a run-on sentence with incorrect structure. There are also issues with subject-verb agreement, articles, and prepositions. For instance, 'via internet' should be 'via the internet', and 'by zero cost' should be 'at zero cost'. Additionally, the sentence 'And if we used less paper then fewer trees cut down' has incorrect verb form. To improve, practice using a variety of sentence structures, ensure subject-verb agreement, and proofread for common errors. Using more complex structures accurately will also enhance the score.

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