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Band 5+: In some countries young people are encouraged to work or travel for a year between finishing high schools and starting universities studies. Discuss the advantages and disadvantages of young people who decide to do this.

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In recent years, it is common that young people are concerned about to get employed or have a trip for a year between finishing high school and beginning studies of university.

The reasons of taking a gap year might be that young population do not know and are not sure about their future. That’s why they will understand that there is no need to rush and start to feel more relaxed. Moreover, young people have a time to know themselves more and be sure about who to become in the future, deciding exactly that profession. While working and travelling, they will be open-minded and never get scared of exploring new countries or different cities.

On the other side, there is a fact that young people will lose an another year for waste. Furthermore, they would have saved that year and start to prepare for their exams properly instead. After that, they would get into the best universities in the world or their dreamed colleges. There an another side is that before planning to attend to journeys, they had to be asking some money from their parents. That would be the serious waste of money. Even though they get job for a year, the given salary will not be quite a lot and they might not have time for preparing. It is because of not graduating from the university and having a diploma.

In conclusion, I believe that young people have a right to be encouraged to work or exploring new places for a year to get themselves better.

Word Count: 258

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Overall Band Score

(+/- 0.5)

Vocabulary Complexity:
B1 - Intermediate
Using more sophisticated words could be beneficial.

Grammar Mistakes: N/A

Vocabulary Repetition:

young: 5

people: 4

their: 4

about: 3

there: 3

would: 3

Try using synonyms for the above words

Task Response

The essay addresses the main parts of the prompt and presents a position. However, the ideas lack clarity and sufficient development. To improve, focus on providing more specific examples and elaborating on the reasoning behind your points. Also, ensure a clearer structure with well-defined paragraphs, and refine your language for better precision.

Coherence & Cohesion

The essay demonstrates some organization, but the progression of ideas is not always clear. Paragraphing is present, but could be used more effectively to separate distinct points. Transitions between sentences and paragraphs are sometimes abrupt, hindering the overall flow. To improve coherence, ensure each paragraph focuses on a single, well-defined idea, and use transition words and phrases to connect ideas smoothly.

Lexical Resource

The essay uses a limited range of vocabulary, with some inaccuracies in word choice. There is an attempt to use more complex words, but these are not always used appropriately. To improve lexical resource, focus on expanding your vocabulary and using words accurately in context. Pay attention to collocations and idiomatic expressions to enhance the naturalness of your writing. Boost vocabulary complexity to elevate the overall score.

Grammatical Range & Accuracy

The essay contains numerous grammatical errors, including incorrect verb tenses, subject-verb agreement issues, and awkward sentence structures. These errors frequently impede understanding. To improve grammatical range and accuracy, focus on mastering basic grammar rules and practicing sentence construction. Review grammar concepts and seek feedback on your writing to identify and correct errors.

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Band 5+: In some countries young people are encouraged to work or travel for a year between finishing high schools and starting universities studies. Discuss the advantages and disadvantages of young people who decide to do this.

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Task Response

Coherence & Cohesion

Lexical Resource

Grammatical Range & Accuracy

Essays On The Same Topic:

In some countries young people are encouraged to work or travel for a year between finishing high schools and starting universities studies. Discuss the advantages and disadvantages of young people who decide to do this.

In some countries young people are encouraged to work or travel for a year between finishing high schools and starting universities studies. Discuss the advantages and disadvantages of young people who decide to do this.

In some countries young people are encouraged to work or travel for a year between finishing high schools and starting universities studies. Discuss the advantages and disadvantages of young people who decide to do this.

In some countries young people are encouraged to work or travel for a year between finishing high schools and starting universities studies. Discuss the advantages and disadvantages of young people who decide to do this.

In some countries young people are encouraged to work or travel for a year between finishing high schools and starting universities studies. Discuss the advantages and disadvantages of young people who decide to do this.

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Today, in many countries, people in big cities live either alone or in small family units, rather than large, extended family groups. Are the benefits of this change greater than the drawbacks?

Check Your Own Essay On This Topic?

Generate A Band-9 Sample With Your Idea?

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