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Band 6+: Many people choose to live in high-rise apartment buildings rather than traditional houses. What are the reasons for this trend? Do the benefits outweigh the drawbacks?

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Instead of houses, more and more people are residing in tall apartment buildings in various cities around the world. These apartments are not really spacious but their advantage is that they are affordable.

One viable advantage of this is that high-rise apartments are affordable. Previously, people had to wait decades and save tons of capital in order to purchase houses but now even those with low income can afford to live in apartments. This allows them to have a roof above their head and gives them a feeling of ownership, which was’nt possible before. For instance, In US, new entrepreneurs are able to purchase their own apartments even if they started their business an year ago.

On the other hand, apartments are not as spacious as houses. Families with few members can live in them but those with big family will find it undeniably dificult. Each person has their own clothes, bed andcupboard. When a large numbered family lives in there, things will get messy. This causes frustration and they will fight with each other for more space, privacy and seperate room. As a result, their family bond will be negative effected. For example, in Pakistan the average family size is of 6-8 people, making it hard for them to live in an apartment of 2 rooms.

In conclusion, there is a rise in number of people who are now residing in high-rise apartment buildings because of the affordability factor. However, they don’t get the same experience as they would get in a house as there is not enough space in them.

Word Count: 262

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Overall Band Score

6.5

(+/- 0.5)

Vocabulary Complexity:
B2 - Upper Intermediate
Opt for even more advanced words when appropriate.

Grammar Mistakes: N/A

Vocabulary Repetition:

their: 6

apartments: 5

people: 4

family: 4

houses: 3

apartment: 3

there: 3

Try using synonyms for the above words

Task Response

The essay addresses the prompt by discussing both advantages and disadvantages of living in high-rise apartments. A clear position is presented, and main ideas are relevant, though development lacks depth and precision. The advantage (affordability) and disadvantage (lack of space) are supported with examples, but the reasoning is somewhat simplistic and could be more fully extended. Some errors in grammar and spelling (e.g., 'was'nt', 'dificult', 'seperate', 'negative effected') slightly affect clarity. To improve, consider providing more detailed explanations and varied examples, and ensure grammatical accuracy. Additionally, the conclusion could better summarize the key points without introducing new ideas.

Coherence & Cohesion

The essay is well-organized with a clear introduction, two body paragraphs addressing advantages and disadvantages, and a conclusion. The progression of ideas is logical and easy to follow. However, there are minor lapses in cohesion, such as the abrupt transition between paragraphs and the lack of a clear topic sentence in the second body paragraph. To improve, consider using more varied cohesive devices (e.g., 'Furthermore', 'In contrast') and ensuring each paragraph has a clear central topic. Additionally, the conclusion could briefly summarize both sides before restating your opinion.

Lexical Resource

You have used a good range of vocabulary, including some less common words (e.g., 'viable', 'affordability', 'undeniably'). However, there are several spelling and word choice errors (e.g., 'was'nt' should be 'wasn't', 'an year' should be 'a year', 'dificult' should be 'difficult', 'seperate' should be 'separate', 'negative effected' should be 'negatively affected'). These errors slightly reduce the clarity and precision of your writing. To achieve a higher score, proofread carefully and expand your use of collocations and precise vocabulary. Boost vocabulary complexity to elevate the overall score.

Grammatical Range & Accuracy

You have attempted a mix of simple and complex sentence structures, but there are frequent grammatical errors that sometimes hinder communication. For example, 'was'nt' is missing an apostrophe, 'an year' uses the wrong article, 'big family' should be 'big families', 'andcupboard' is missing a space, 'large numbered family' is awkward, and 'negative effected' is incorrect. Punctuation is mostly correct, but there are issues with apostrophes and spacing. To improve, focus on subject-verb agreement, article usage, and proofreading for common errors. Practice constructing more accurate complex sentences.

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Band 6+: Many people choose to live in high-rise apartment buildings rather than traditional houses. What are the reasons for this trend? Do the benefits outweigh the drawbacks?

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Essays On The Same Topic:

Many people choose to live in high-rise apartment buildings rather than traditional houses. What are the reasons for this trend? Do the benefits outweigh the drawbacks?

Many people choose to live in high-rise apartment buildings rather than traditional houses. What are the reasons for this trend? Do the benefits outweigh the drawbacks?

Many people choose to live in high-rise apartment buildings rather than traditional houses. What are the reasons for this trend? Do the benefits outweigh the drawbacks?

Many people choose to live in high-rise apartment buildings rather than traditional houses. What are the reasons for this trend? Do the benefits outweigh the drawbacks?

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