Advantage And Disadvantage

Band 5+: Many students today graduate high school and want to continue their studies overseas. Give the advantages and disadvantages of studying abroad.

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In contemporary society, studying in foreign coutries has become increasingly common. In my view, the advantages of this trend significantly outweigh its disadvantages because study abroad can give lots of opportunity for young people and help to gain really good study experiences.

One the one hand, there are some certain drawbacks to this development. The main disadvantages is that studying abroad is not easy because it requires lots of money and hard work. For example, in USA and Europe costs of one year education higher than 100$ and not everyone can let to pay a lot of money. Furthermore, students have to know several languages such as English because it is global language in the world. Moreover, there are some tests that students have to take before attending foreign university. The most common test is IELTS and it is not easy to prepare and take a flying collors.

On the other hand, I believe the benefits are far more significant. The main reason is a higher education helps to get a high salary and may help to work in a big companies. Furthermore, study abroad does not give only a higher education and also give apportunity to learn their traditions and culture. For example, when students go to the foreign country, they will know their traditional clothes and food.

In conclusion, although studying in another country requires lots of time and effort, I strongly believe the advantages of this trend are much more beneficial because students can make a friends with international people and learn about this country.

Word Count: 258

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Overall Band Score

(+/- 0.5)

Vocabulary Complexity:
C1 - Intricate
Strive to incorporate even richer and more precise language.

Grammar Mistakes: N/A

Vocabulary Repetition:

because: 4

students: 4

studying: 3

foreign: 3

study: 3

abroad: 3

education: 3

higher: 3

country: 3

Try using synonyms for the above words

Task Response

The essay addresses the prompt by discussing both advantages and disadvantages of studying abroad, and a clear position is presented. However, the development of ideas is somewhat limited and lacks precision. For example, the disadvantages are not fully explored, and the advantages are supported with general statements rather than specific examples. To improve, ensure each point is clearly explained and supported with relevant details. Additionally, pay attention to grammar and vocabulary to enhance clarity and accuracy.

Coherence & Cohesion

The essay has a clear structure with an introduction, two body paragraphs (one for disadvantages, one for advantages), and a conclusion. However, the flow is sometimes disrupted by abrupt transitions and unclear referencing. For example, the phrase 'One the one hand' is a typo, and the link between ideas within paragraphs could be smoother. The conclusion introduces a new point ('make friends with international people') that was not discussed earlier, which slightly weakens cohesion. To improve, ensure each paragraph has a clear topic sentence and that all points are logically connected and developed.

Lexical Resource

The essay uses a range of vocabulary related to the topic, such as 'contemporary society', 'trend', 'drawbacks', 'benefits', and 'higher education'. However, there are several errors in word choice and collocation, e.g., 'coutries' (spelling), 'give lots of opportunity' (should be 'opportunities'), 'let to pay' (should be 'afford to pay'), 'take a flying collors' (incorrect idiom, likely 'with flying colors'), and 'make a friends' (should be 'make friends'). To improve, focus on accurate spelling and using more precise and natural vocabulary. Avoid informal phrases like 'really good' and 'lots of' in academic writing. Boost vocabulary complexity to elevate the overall score.

Grammatical Range & Accuracy

The essay attempts to use a variety of sentence structures, but there are numerous grammatical errors that affect clarity. Examples include subject-verb agreement ('The main disadvantages is' should be 'The main disadvantage is'), missing articles ('in USA' should be 'in the USA'), incorrect verb forms ('costs of one year education higher than 100$' should be 'costs of one year of education are higher than $100'), and punctuation issues. The phrase 'take a flying collors' is a serious error. To improve, review basic grammar rules, especially subject-verb agreement, articles, and prepositions. Practice writing more complex sentences with accurate grammar.

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