Discussion

Band 4+: Some people believe that governments should spend more money on space exploration, while others think this money should be used to help people living in poverty. Discuss both views and give your own opinion. Write at least 250 words.

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A wide range of people believe that space exploration is essential for our future, while others consider there are problems that must be solved as soon as possible such as: climate change and gender wars. From my perspective, space exploration is not that important, there are many issues that governents should focus on.

On the one hand, space exploration can be beneficial if scientists found something interesting at some of the planets. Individuals definitely read more and they will get huge assist from the journalists and news. Consequently, by the interest from citizens investors also could be interested and invest more money to space exploration companies. Furthermore, a connect with aliesn can bring compelling benefits to Earth, cure for cancer or how to teleport.

On the other hand, in recent years, with the improvement of digital devices the world had some problems with communicating with each other, gender wars caused by social media, inflation. All of these issues looks more important at the time. From my point of view, the biggest difficulty is avoiding the world war 3. As far as I know, USA and Iran, Russia and Ukraine, Israel and Palestine are already fighting. Moreover, climate change is also an enormous problem, 10 thousand people around the Europe died in this summer because of heat.

Since NASA moved from ocean exploration to space they have not achieved something significant. Therefore, if they will not find anything in space, they should stop investing money to space.

In conclusion, sace exploration is vital but, governments should not focus on space, there are issues that should be solved immediately.

Word Count: 267

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Overall Band Score

(+/- 0.5)

Vocabulary Complexity:
C1 - Intricate
Strive to incorporate even richer and more precise language.

Grammar Mistakes: N/A

Vocabulary Repetition:

space: 7

exploration: 6

should: 4

there: 3

issues: 3

Try using synonyms for the above words

Task Response

The essay addresses the main parts of the prompt by discussing both perspectives and stating a personal view. However, the development of ideas is limited and lacks clarity. The arguments for space exploration are vague and rely on speculative benefits (e.g., alien contact, cures). The discussion of pressing issues is unfocused, mixing unrelated topics like 'gender wars' and 'world war 3' without clear connection to the prompt. The position is stated but not well-supported with relevant, concrete examples or reasoning. To improve, ensure each perspective is clearly explained with specific, logical points, and avoid introducing irrelevant or unsupported claims. Focus on developing ideas with clear examples and a coherent structure.

Coherence & Cohesion

The essay has a basic structure with an introduction, body paragraphs, and a conclusion, but the flow of ideas is often disrupted. The connection between sentences and paragraphs is weak, and some points (e.g., 'gender wars' and 'world war 3') are introduced without clear development or logical links. The conclusion partially restates the introduction but does not effectively summarize the discussion. To improve, use clear topic sentences for each paragraph, ensure each paragraph focuses on one main idea, and use cohesive devices (e.g., 'however,' 'furthermore,' 'in contrast') to link ideas smoothly.

Lexical Resource

The vocabulary is limited and often imprecise, with errors such as 'governents' (governments), 'aliesn' (aliens), and 'assist' (assistance). There is some attempt to use topic-related words (e.g., 'space exploration,' 'climate change'), but the range is narrow, and phrasing is sometimes awkward (e.g., 'huge assist from the journalists'). To improve, expand your vocabulary by learning synonyms and collocations, and practice using words accurately in context. Avoid informal or unclear terms like 'gender wars' and ensure spelling is correct. Boost vocabulary complexity to elevate the overall score.

Grammatical Range & Accuracy

The essay contains frequent grammatical errors, including subject-verb agreement ('issues looks'), incorrect verb tenses ('if they will not find'), and missing or incorrect articles ('a connect with aliesn'). Punctuation is inconsistent (e.g., missing commas, incorrect use of colons). Sentence structures are mostly simple, with limited use of complex sentences. To improve, review basic grammar rules (e.g., subject-verb agreement, conditional sentences) and practice writing a variety of sentence types. Proofread carefully to catch errors like 'sace' (space) and 'governents' (governments).

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