Bar Chart

Band 5+: The bar chart below shows employment figures in different tourism-related industries between 2009 and 2019. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

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Image for topic: The bar chart below shows employment figures in different tourism-related industries between 2009 and 2019. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

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The image displays a bar chart comparing total employment in thousands across five categories for the years 2009 and 2019. For 2009, 'Sports' shows 299.2, 'Travel' lists 60.9, 'Hotel (and other accomodation)' is at 284.7, 'Culture (museums, galleries, etc.)' has 283.4 and 'Food' is 82.8. For 2019, 'Sports' indicates 306.0, 'Travel' is 114.2, 'Hotel (and other accomodation)' displays 345.7, 'Culture (museums, galleries, etc.)' presents 357.7 and 'Food' is 77.4.

Given the complexity of the image, the above description may not be entirely accurate.

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The bar chart displays changes of the total number employment in tourism sector jobs between 2009 and 2019. Overall, there was a upward trend in all industries, especially in Food, unlike Culture zone that experienced steady fall.

According the given data in 2009, Food, Sports and Accommodation industries provides job in similar proportions. In detail, Hotel demonstrated 299.2 total workers in 2009 and steadly gained popularity to 306,0 after 10 years. The food companies recorded more visible changes, in 2009 amount of total workers measure at 283,4 but saw the rise in 2019 at 357,7 people. Continue increasing trend, sport sector performed well, fixed data of employees at 284,7 in 2009 and increasing the figures to 345,7 10 years later.

Meantime, Travel job sector has almost doubled in 2019, recorded data at 114,2 employees, in comparison with 10 years before, when the data measured at 60,9 workers total. By contrast, there was also decreasing trend in Culture industry. Unlike success in other sectors, Culture recorded a slight fall, from 82.8 thousand people in 2009 to 77.4 thousand in 2019.

Word Count: 179

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Overall Band Score

(+/- 0.5)

Vocabulary Complexity:
B2 - Upper Intermediate
Opt for even more advanced words when appropriate.

Grammar Mistakes: N/A

Vocabulary Repetition:

total: 4

sector: 3

trend: 3

culture: 3

workers: 3

years: 3

recorded: 3

Try using synonyms for the above words

Task Response

The report attempts to address the task by describing the bar chart and making some comparisons. However, there are several inaccuracies in the data (e.g., mixing up figures for Sports, Hotel, and Food) and some misinterpretations of trends (e.g., stating an upward trend in all industries while mentioning a fall in Culture). The overall structure is present, but the report would benefit from clearer organization and more precise language. Focus on accurately selecting and reporting the main features, and ensure that comparisons are logically presented without contradictory statements.

Coherence & Cohesion

The report has a basic structure with an introduction, an overview, and a body paragraph, but the flow of information is sometimes disrupted by unclear referencing and awkward transitions. For example, the overview mentions an upward trend in all industries but then contradicts itself by noting a fall in Culture. The paragraphing could be improved by grouping related industries more logically and using clearer linking words to guide the reader. To enhance coherence, ensure that each paragraph focuses on a clear main idea and that comparisons are introduced smoothly.

Lexical Resource

The vocabulary used is adequate for the task, with some attempts at variation (e.g., 'steadily gained popularity', 'visible changes', 'slight fall'). However, there are several inaccuracies and inappropriate word choices, such as 'provides job in similar proportions', 'fixed data of employees', and 'Culture zone'. The phrasing often sounds unnatural or imprecise. To improve, focus on using more precise and natural collocations (e.g., 'employment figures', 'experienced growth', 'saw a decline') and avoid informal or vague terms.

Grammatical Range & Accuracy

The report contains numerous grammatical errors and punctuation issues that affect clarity and readability. Examples include missing articles ('a upward trend'), incorrect verb forms ('provides job', 'data measured'), subject-verb agreement errors ('industries provides'), and inconsistent use of commas and decimal points. Sentence structures are often repetitive or incomplete. To improve, practice using a wider range of sentence structures (e.g., complex sentences with relative clauses) and review basic grammar rules, especially tense consistency, article usage, and subject-verb agreement.

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