Bar Chart

Band 4+: The bar chart below shows the percentage participation of men in senior development in three companies between 1980 and the year 2010. Summarise the information by selecting and report in the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

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Image for topic: The bar chart below shows the percentage participation of men in senior development in three companies between 1980 and the year 2010. Summarise the information by selecting and report in the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

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The image displays a bar chart with three sets of data for IBM, Microsoft, and Apple representing the percentage of men in senior development positions from 1980 to 2010 at five-year intervals. For IBM: 1980 - 30%, 1985 - 20%, 1990 - 37%, 1995 - 47%, 2000 - 49%, 2010 - 25%. For Microsoft: 1980 - 17%, 1985 - 17%, 1990 - 25%, 1995 - 20%, 2000 - 51%, 2010 - 53%. Apple: 1980 - 32%, 1985 - 40%, 1990 - 18%, 1995 - 20%, 2000 - 12%, 2010 - 60%.

Given the complexity of the image, the above description may not be entirely accurate.

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The bar chart illustrates the propotion engagement of male in senior developement in IBM, Microsoft and Apple from 1980 to 2010.Overall, IBM has made up majorty in participation of men while Apple has the lowest ratio throughout the period.

At the outset, the percentage participation of men in IBM was only 2% – the minimum number. After five years, there have a dramatical increase, in particular, the senior in IBM peaked at more 63% (31 times as start time).

Conversely, the number of workers in Apple were the highest proportion in 1980 (according to 13%), but in 2010, it had a lowest percentage engagement (1/3 as IBM in the same time). To explain that, from 1985 to 1990 saw a slightly decline and Apple had to spend 5 years later recovering the growth of senior.

Microsoft was the most stable growth. It increased slightly and steadily throughout the period. Getting top 2 in the last period also proved that Microsoft created stable income for employee.

Word Count: 165

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Overall Band Score

4.5

(+/- 0.5)

Vocabulary Complexity:
B2 - Upper Intermediate
Opt for even more advanced words when appropriate.

Grammar Mistakes: N/A

Vocabulary Repetition:

apple: 4

Try using synonyms for the above words

Task Response

The report attempts to address the task but contains significant inaccuracies and misinterpretations of the data. Key points are often inaccurate and inappropriate, leading to a flawed summary of the information. To improve, focus on accurately representing the data from the chart, avoid drawing unsupported conclusions, and ensure correct use of comparative language.

Coherence & Cohesion

The report's organization is somewhat unclear, and the progression of ideas is not always logical. The introduction and overview are present, but the body paragraphs lack clear topic sentences and transitions. The report also contains some irrelevant information. To improve coherence, ensure each paragraph focuses on a specific aspect of the data and use transition words to connect ideas smoothly. For example, use phrases like 'In contrast,' 'Similarly,' or 'However' to show relationships between different companies or time periods. Also, avoid including personal opinions or interpretations not directly supported by the data.

Lexical Resource

The report uses a limited range of vocabulary, and there are instances of inaccurate word choice ('propotion engagement,' 'majorty,' 'dramatical increase'). The vocabulary does not consistently and effectively convey the information. To enhance lexical resource, try to use synonyms and more precise language to describe trends and data. For example, instead of 'increase,' consider using 'rise,' 'growth,' or 'escalation.' Instead of 'stable growth,' use 'consistent increase' or 'steady progression.' Also, ensure that the vocabulary used is appropriate for describing numerical data and trends.

Grammatical Range & Accuracy

The report contains numerous grammatical errors, including incorrect verb tenses, subject-verb agreement issues, and errors in article usage. Sentence structure is often awkward and unclear, affecting the overall readability. To improve grammatical range and accuracy, focus on using a variety of sentence structures correctly. Pay attention to verb tenses, ensuring they are consistent and appropriate for the context. Proofread carefully to identify and correct errors in grammar and punctuation. Consider using online grammar checkers or seeking feedback from a native English speaker to identify and address recurring errors.

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The bar chart below shows the percentage participation of men in senior development in three companies between 1980 and the year 2010. Summarise the information by selecting and report in the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

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Band 4+: The bar chart below shows the percentage participation of men in senior development in three companies between 1980 and the year 2010. Summarise the information by selecting and report in the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

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Overall Band Score

Task Response

Coherence & Cohesion

Lexical Resource

Grammatical Range & Accuracy

Answers On The Same Topic:

The bar chart below shows the percentage participation of men in senior development in three companies between 1980 and the year 2010. Summarise the information by selecting and report in the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

The bar chart below shows the percentage participation of men in senior development in three companies between 1980 and the year 2010. Summarise the information by selecting and report in the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

The bar chart below shows the percentage participation of men in senior development in three companies between 1980 and the year 2010. Summarise the information by selecting and report in the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

The bar chart below shows the percentage participation of men in senior development in three companies between 1980 and the year 2010. Summarise the information by selecting and report in the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

The bar chart below shows the percentage participation of men in senior development in three companies between 1980 and the year 2010. Summarise the information by selecting and report in the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

Other Topics:

The bar charts below show the percentage of men and women in employment in three countries in 2005 and 2016

The bar chart shows the percentage of students in Country X who participated in football, basketball, tennis, and swimming in 2010 and 2020.

The chart gives information about the age of the population of Iceland between 2020 and 2050. Summarize the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

The chart below shows the percentage of whole world population in four countries from 1950 to 2000, with projections till 2050. Summarize the information by selecting and reporting the main features and make comparisons where relevant.

The chart below shows the annual number of rentals and sales (in various formats) of films from a particular store between 2002 and 2011. Summarize the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparison

The chart below shows the annual number of rentals and sales (in various formats) of films from a particular store between 2002 and 2011. Summarize the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparison

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Task Response

Coherence & Cohesion

Lexical Resource

Grammatical Range & Accuracy

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