Bar Chart

Band 5+: The bar chart below shows the percentages of adults who engaged in different activities (watching TV, doing exercise, and using the Internet) in three age groups in a particular year. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

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Image for topic: The bar chart below shows the percentages of adults who engaged in different activities (watching TV, doing exercise, and using the Internet) in three age groups in a particular year. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

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The image is a bar chart showing percentages of adults in three age groups engaging in different activities. For the 18–34 age group, the percentages are: Watching TV 58%, Doing exercise 45%, and Using Internet 30%. For the 35–54 age group, the figures are: Watching TV 46%, Doing exercise 37%, and Using Internet 67%. For the 55+ age group, the data is: Watching TV 63%, Doing exercise 37%, and Using Internet 49%.

Given the complexity of the image, the above description may not be entirely accurate.

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The bar chart describes the rate of adults who engaged in watching TV, doing exercise, and using the Internet in three age groups in a particular year.

In general, it is clear that watching TV is the highest in from 18 to 34 ages and in more 55 ages. However doing exercise is ranked first in between 35 and 54 ages. Interestingly, using internet is the lowest in the youngest age group and middle age group.

Looking at the details, in from 18 to 34 age group, watching TV account for more half and doing exercise take up about 45%. Plus, using internet is the lowest at 30%. In middle group that have from 35 to 54 ages, doing exercise is the biggest as roughly 68% and watching TV follow to it as 45%. In addition, the oldest group experience that watching TV is the highest as more than 60% but doing exercise is the lowest as approximately 38%.

Word Count: 159

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Overall Band Score

5.5

(+/- 0.5)

Vocabulary Complexity:
B1 - Intermediate
Using more sophisticated words could be beneficial.

Grammar Mistakes: N/A

Vocabulary Repetition:

watching: 5

doing: 5

exercise: 5

group: 4

using: 3

internet: 3

lowest: 3

Try using synonyms for the above words

Task Response

The report identifies some key trends and provides some data support, but there are inaccuracies in the data reported. The organization is acceptable, but the language contains errors that affect clarity. To improve, ensure data accuracy and proofread carefully for grammatical errors.

Coherence & Cohesion

The report has some issues with coherence and cohesion. The ideas are not always presented in a logical order, and the transitions between sentences and paragraphs could be smoother. For example, the shift from the general overview to the specific details in the second paragraph is abrupt. Consider using transition words and phrases to connect your ideas more effectively and improve the flow of your writing. Also, organizing the information by age group or activity could enhance clarity.

Lexical Resource

The report demonstrates an adequate range of vocabulary, but there are instances where more precise word choices could enhance the description. For example, instead of saying 'the rate of adults,' consider using 'the percentage of adults.' Also, try to vary your vocabulary to avoid repetition. For instance, instead of repeatedly using 'highest' and 'lowest,' explore synonyms like 'greatest,' 'smallest,' or 'least prevalent.' Boost vocabulary complexity to elevate the overall score.

Grammatical Range & Accuracy

The report contains several grammatical errors that affect clarity. There are issues with preposition usage ('in from 18 to 34 ages'), verb tense ('doing exercise is ranked first'), and sentence structure. For example, the sentence 'In middle group that have from 35 to 54 ages, doing exercise is the biggest as roughly 68% and watching TV follow to it as 45%' is grammatically incorrect and difficult to understand. Focus on improving your understanding of basic grammar rules and sentence construction to enhance the accuracy of your writing. Proofreading carefully can also help you identify and correct errors.

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