Bar Chart

Band 6+: The bar chart shows the information of the number of volunteers and paid workers in 4 different roles in the sport sector of an australian town in 2015

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Image for topic: The bar chart shows the information of the number of volunteers and paid workers in 4 different roles in the sport sector of an australian town in 2015

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The image depicts a bar chart illustrating the number of people involved in four sports sectors in an Australian town in 2015, segmented into volunteer and paid categories: Coaches have 70 participants in the volunteer category and 50 in the paid category; Referees have 40 volunteers and 55 paid individuals; Managers have 25 volunteers and 55 paid individuals; Other sections have 55 volunteers and 40 paid participants.

Given the complexity of the image, the above description may not be entirely accurate.

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These charts compare the number of people working as volunteers and paid staff in four sports sectors in an Australian town in 2015.

Overall, the number of volunteer coaches is the highest, while the number of referees is the lowest. In contrast, the number of paid workers is relatively similar across the sectors.

Firstly, the number of volunteer coaches is approximately 75, which is the highest among the categories, while around 60 volunteers are involved in other areas. Additionally, the number of managers is half that of the coaches. The number of referees is approximately 30, making it the lowest figure among the volunteers.

Word Count: 104

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Overall Band Score

(+/- 0.5)

Vocabulary Complexity:
C1 - Intricate
Strive to incorporate even richer and more precise language.

Grammar Mistakes: N/A

Vocabulary Repetition:

number: 7

volunteers: 3

coaches: 3

Try using synonyms for the above words

Task Response

The report provides a general overview of the bar chart, but it includes some inaccuracies in the data reported. For example, the number of volunteer coaches is closer to 70, not 75, and the number of referees is 40, not 30. The report also only focuses on the volunteer data and doesn't provide a comprehensive comparison with the paid staff data across all sectors. To improve, ensure data accuracy and include a more balanced comparison of both volunteer and paid staff numbers in all four sectors. The report falls short of the required 150 words.

Coherence & Cohesion

The report is generally well-organized with a clear overview and logical progression. However, the connection between the second and third paragraphs could be strengthened to improve the flow. Consider using transition words or phrases to link ideas more explicitly.

Lexical Resource

The report demonstrates a good range of vocabulary appropriate for the task. However, there's room to incorporate more precise language to describe the data. For example, instead of 'approximately 75,' you could say 'nearly 75' or 'around 70'. Also, try to avoid repeating words like 'number' too frequently by using synonyms such as 'proportion' or 'quantity'.

Grammatical Range & Accuracy

The report exhibits a strong command of grammar with very few errors. The sentence structures are varied and appropriate. A minor improvement could be to ensure complete accuracy in reporting the data, aligning precisely with the provided chart.

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