Bar Chart

Band 6+: The bar graph below shows the imports of electronics goods in 2000 and 2006, write it down.

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The image presents a bar graph detailing imports of electronic goods in millions of units for the years 2000 and 2006 across five categories: DVD players (2000: 3, 2006: 5.8), CD players (2000: 2.1, 2006: 1.7), televisions (2000: 6.2, 2006: 8.5), radios (2000: 4, 2006: 5.2), and video recorders (2000: 6.2, 2006: 2.8).

Given the complexity of the image, the above description may not be entirely accurate.

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The bar chart depicts electronic goods and compare their import between 2000 and 2006.

According to the graph, the most substantial changes were in import of DVD players, which has almost doubled up to 5.8 millions of units in 2006, while, after peaking at 6.2 millions of units in 2000, the import of video recorders has droped sharply almost by 3 millions of units. Additionally, it can be seen that there was an equal amount of import of television and video recorders in 2000.

Furthemore, the most prevalent type of electronic goods import was releated to television, which has significant upward trend to 8.5 millions of units in 2006. Contrary, import in CD player has been the most invisible and uncommon, moreover, there was a steady downward trend in this type of players from 2000 to 2006.

Overall, the reveal variations in import volumes for electronic goods between two years, highlighting both increases and decreases depending on the category.

Word Count: 159

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Overall Band Score

(+/- 0.5)

Vocabulary Complexity:
C1 - Intricate
Strive to incorporate even richer and more precise language.

Grammar Mistakes: N/A

Vocabulary Repetition:

import: 7

millions: 4

units: 4

electronic: 3

goods: 3

Try using synonyms for the above words

Task Response

The report adequately addresses the task by describing the main trends and comparing the data for the two years. It covers all categories and highlights key changes, such as the increase in DVD players and the decrease in video recorders. However, there are some minor omissions and inaccuracies, such as not mentioning the exact figures for radios and televisions in 2000, and the phrase 'the most invisible and uncommon' is awkward. Additionally, there are a few grammatical errors and spelling mistakes (e.g., 'droped', 'Furthemore', 'releated'). To improve, ensure all data points are accurately reported and refine language for clarity and precision.

Coherence & Cohesion

The report has a logical structure with an introduction, body paragraphs, and an overall summary. However, the flow is sometimes disrupted by awkward phrasing and unclear references. For example, the phrase 'the most substantial changes were in import of DVD players' could be more precise. Additionally, the use of cohesive devices is limited and sometimes inaccurate, such as 'Contrary' instead of 'In contrast'. The paragraphing is adequate but could be improved by more clearly separating different trends.

Lexical Resource

The report uses a range of vocabulary related to describing trends, such as 'substantial changes', 'peaking', 'droped sharply', 'upward trend', and 'steady downward trend'. However, there are several spelling errors (e.g., 'droped' should be 'dropped', 'Furthemore' should be 'Furthermore', 'releated' should be 'related') and some awkward word choices (e.g., 'the most invisible and uncommon' is not appropriate). The lexical range is adequate but not fully flexible or sophisticated.

Grammatical Range & Accuracy

The report contains a variety of sentence structures, but there are numerous grammatical errors that affect clarity. For instance, 'compare their import' should be 'compares their imports', 'has almost doubled up' should be 'almost doubled', 'has droped sharply' should be 'dropped sharply', and 'there was an equal amount of import' should be 'there were equal imports'. Additionally, there are issues with subject-verb agreement and article usage. These errors impede the reader's ability to follow the message effortlessly.

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