Bar Chart

Band 5+: The chart below shows the percentage of graduates from a UK university who found full-time employment, part-time employment, or further study within one year of completing their bachelor's degree in 2023, summarised by faculty. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

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Image for topic: The chart below shows the percentage of graduates from a UK university who found full-time employment, part-time employment, or further study within one year of completing their bachelor's degree in 2023, summarised by faculty. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

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The image is a bar chart titled 'Employment Status of Graduates by Faculty (2023)', detailing the percentage of graduates in three categories across four faculties. For Sciences: Full-Time Employment is 52%, Part-Time Employment is 15%, and Further Study is 33%. For Arts & Humanities: Full-Time Employment is 41%, Part-Time Employment is 28%, and Further Study is 31%. For Engineering: Full-Time Employment is 71%, Part-Time Employment is 8%, and Further Study is 21%. For Social Sciences: Full-Time Employment is 48%, Part-Time Employment is 22%, and Further Study is 30%.

Given the complexity of the image, the above description may not be entirely accurate.

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The illustraion presents the share of employment status of sciences, arts&humanities, engineering and social sciences UK graduates in 2023.

Overall, the percentage of full time employment in every faculty is the biggest and the percentage of part time employment in every category is the smallest. The further study in each faculty is similar

There are 3 faculties which have the same results: sciences, art&humanities and social sciences where the share of full time employment equals around 50 percentages. Further study accounts about 20 or 30 percentages and the remaining part is left for part time employment. But there is a faculty of engineering where share of full time employment equals 70 percentages, further study also have 20.

In summery, the biggest part of graduates students start to work full time employment (around half of students in every faculty), 20 or 30 percentages go to further study and the fewest proportion start to work part time employment.

Word Count: 156

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Overall Band Score

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Vocabulary Complexity:
C2 - Complex
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Grammar Mistakes: N/A

Vocabulary Repetition:

employment: 8

sciences: 4

further: 4

study: 4

percentages: 4

share: 3

every: 3

faculty: 3

Try using synonyms for the above words

Task Response

The report addresses the task by presenting an overview and some key features, but it contains several inaccuracies and omissions. For instance, it states that part-time employment is the smallest in every faculty, which is incorrect for Arts & Humanities (where further study is smaller). It also inaccurately groups Sciences, Arts & Humanities, and Social Sciences as having similar results, ignoring notable differences in their part-time employment percentages. The report omits specific data for each faculty, which is required for a full description. To improve, ensure all main features are accurately reported, include specific percentages, and make clear comparisons between faculties. Additionally, correct spelling and grammar errors (e.g., 'illustraion', 'summery') and avoid vague statements like 'around 50 percentages'.

Coherence & Cohesion

The report has a clear overall structure with an introduction, overview, and body paragraphs, but the flow is disrupted by abrupt transitions and a lack of cohesive devices. The overview is somewhat vague and could be more precise. The body paragraphs are not well-developed, and the final paragraph repeats information without adding a clear summary. To improve, use a range of linking words and phrases (e.g., 'in contrast', 'similarly', 'whereas') and ensure each paragraph has a clear central idea with supporting details. Also, avoid repeating the same information in the conclusion.

Lexical Resource

The vocabulary is adequate but limited, with some repetition and imprecise word choices. For example, 'share' is used repeatedly, and phrases like 'the biggest part' and 'the fewest proportion' are informal and less precise. There are also spelling errors (e.g., 'illustraion', 'summery') and incorrect word forms (e.g., 'graduates students'). To improve, use a wider range of academic vocabulary (e.g., 'proportion', 'majority', 'minority', 'account for', 'comprise') and ensure correct spelling and word formation. Avoid informal language and strive for more precise and varied expressions.

Grammatical Range & Accuracy

The report contains numerous grammatical errors and punctuation issues that affect clarity. There are missing articles (e.g., 'the percentage of full time employment'), incorrect pluralization (e.g., 'percentages' instead of 'percent'), and subject-verb agreement issues. Sentences are often run-ons or incomplete, and punctuation is inconsistent. To improve, focus on sentence structure, use a variety of complex and compound sentences, and proofread for common errors. Pay attention to article usage, subject-verb agreement, and correct use of prepositions. Practicing writing with accurate grammar and punctuation will enhance overall clarity.

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