Bar Chart

Band 6+: the chart shows information about the actual and expected figures of population in three cities

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The image displays a bar chart titled 'Population size (1990 - 2000)' showing population figures in millions for three cities. For Jakarta, the 1990 population was 9.0 million, the 2000 prediction was 11.0 million, and the 2000 actual figure was 12.0 million. For Shanghai, the 1990 population was 12.0 million, the 2000 prediction was 11.0 million, and the 2000 actual figure was 14.5 million. For Sao Paulo, the 1990 population was 18.0 million, the 2000 prediction was 22.0 million, and the 2000 actual figure was 24.0 million.

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The horizontal bar chart illustrates the population size across 3 different cities namely, Jakarta, Sao Paulo, and Shanghai which was recorded in 1990 and comparing prediction for 2000 and actual figure in 2000 the figures measured in millions

Overall, it is evident that most of the cities showed an upward trend. Even though a slight decline was forecasted for Shanghai’s population in 2000 compared to 1990, the actual figure overtook both predicted and previous population size. Throughout the period the highest number was registered in Sao Paulo, while lowest figure was remained in Jakarta. The similarity was recorded between Jakarta and Shanghai predictions for 2000.

Delving into detail, a population of around 16.5 million was recorded in Sao Paulo and it was registered as the highest figure for 1990 population size. Afterwards, the government was predicted remarkable growth for 2000 population size, which was equal approximately 22.3 million. Despite the government prediction it witnessed substantial rise and it reached its peak around 23.9 million.

Around 7.8 million people were registered in 1990 Jakarta city as lowest figure in that year Shanghai population size was equal to 12 million. After that the same predictions were forecasted in both cities (11.8 million), then both megalopolis overtook predictions 15 million population was recorded in Shanghai, while around 13.5 million for Jakarta.

Word Count: 218

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Overall Band Score

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Vocabulary Complexity:
C2 - Complex
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Grammar Mistakes: N/A

Vocabulary Repetition:

population: 8

million: 6

jakarta: 5

figure: 5

shanghai: 4

recorded: 4

cities: 3

paulo: 3

registered: 3

predictions: 3

around: 3

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Task Response

The report adequately addresses the task by describing the main trends and comparing the data across the three cities. It provides an overview and specific details, but there are some inaccuracies in the figures (e.g., Sao Paulo 1990, Jakarta 1990, predictions, and actuals) and a few omissions (e.g., not mentioning all data points precisely). The structure is clear, but the language could be more precise and cohesive. To improve, ensure all data is accurately reported and avoid vague phrases like 'around' when exact figures are given. Also, use more varied vocabulary and ensure grammatical accuracy.

Coherence & Cohesion

The report has a clear overall structure with an introduction, overview, and detailed paragraphs. However, the flow is sometimes disrupted by awkward phrasing and unclear referencing (e.g., 'the similarity was recorded between Jakarta and Shanghai predictions'). The use of cohesive devices is basic and occasionally inaccurate. To improve, ensure each paragraph has a clear central topic and use a wider range of linking words and referencing techniques to enhance readability.

Lexical Resource

The report uses some appropriate vocabulary (e.g., 'upward trend', 'overtook', 'registered', 'megalopolis'), but there are instances of imprecise word choice and repetition (e.g., 'recorded' used multiple times). The range of vocabulary is adequate but not sophisticated. To improve, use more varied and precise terms, and avoid informal or inaccurate expressions like 'the similarity was recorded'.

Grammatical Range & Accuracy

There are several grammatical errors and awkward structures that affect clarity (e.g., 'which was recorded in 1990 and comparing prediction' should be 'which was recorded in 1990 and compares predictions'; 'the lowest figure was remained' should be 'the lowest figure remained'). The report also has issues with subject-verb agreement and article usage. To improve, focus on sentence structure, ensure subject-verb agreement, and proofread for punctuation and article errors.

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