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Band 7+: The charts show the percentage of volunteers by organizations in 2008-2014. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

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Image for topic: The charts show the percentage of volunteers by organizations in 2008-2014. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

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The image contains two pie charts indicating volunteer distribution percentages across five organization categories in the years 2008 and 2014. In 2008, Environmental was 21%, Sport constituted 15%, Educational activities accounted for 24%, Art had 18%, Health Care covered 7%, and Others took up 15%. In 2014, Environmental rose to 29%, Sport decreased to 9%, Educational dropped to 17%, Art fell to 12%, Health Care jumped to 25%, and Others stayed at 8%.

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The pie graphs compare the proportion of volunteers in various categories in 2008 and 2014.

Overall , the percentage of volunteers occupied in Environmental , Sport and Health Care increased over the period , while that of Art , Educational and “Others” figures witnessed a reversed trend .Notably , Environmental organizations constituted the highest portions , whereas the figures for Health Care were the least .

Regarding Environmental,Sport and Health Care figures , the percentages of volunteers joining in environmental , Sport and Health Care institutions started at 21% , 15% and 7% respectively in 2008 . The figure for Environmental volunteers occupation, which ranked first in the chart rose by 8% in 2014. Similarly , the proportion of volunteers in sport rose notably from 15% to 25% during the 6 years period. Additionally , the Health Care category increased by 1% , which constituted the lowest in both years.

Regarding the remaining figure , volunteers in Educational organizations accounted for one-fourth of the chart in 2008 but the figure then dropped significantly to 17% in 2014. The same thing happened to Art volunteers’ occupation , which decreased from 18% to 12% , whereas that of the unwritten categories fell from 15% to 9% in 2008 and 2014.

Word Count: 208

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Overall Band Score

(+/- 0.5)

Vocabulary Complexity:
C2 - Complex
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Grammar Mistakes: N/A

Vocabulary Repetition:

volunteers: 6

health: 5

environmental: 4

sport: 3

figures: 3

figure: 3

which: 3

Try using synonyms for the above words

Task Response

The report effectively addresses the task by providing an overview and comparing the main trends between 2008 and 2014. However, there are some inaccuracies in the data (e.g., Sport is reported as increasing to 25%, but it actually decreased to 9%; Health Care is reported as increasing by 1%, but it actually increased to 25%; Others is reported as falling to 9%, but it actually fell to 8%). These errors detract from the accuracy of the report. To improve, ensure that all data points are correctly reported and that comparisons are made accurately. Additionally, the structure could be enhanced by grouping similar trends more clearly and using more precise language.

Coherence & Cohesion

The report is generally well-organized with clear paragraphing and logical progression. However, there are minor lapses in cohesion, such as the use of 'Regarding Environmental,Sport and Health Care figures' and 'Regarding the remaining figure' which could be smoother. The overall message is easy to follow, but some transitions between ideas could be more refined.

Lexical Resource

The vocabulary used is appropriate and varied, with terms like 'constituted', 'witnessed a reversed trend', and 'accounted for'. However, there are some awkward phrasings and repetitions, such as 'volunteers occupation' and 'the same thing happened', which reduce the naturalness and sophistication. A wider range of precise vocabulary and more natural collocations would improve the score.

Grammatical Range & Accuracy

The report uses a mix of simple and complex structures, but there are several grammatical errors and punctuation issues, such as missing spaces after commas, incorrect use of 'the' before 'Environmental', and awkward phrasing like 'the percentage of volunteers occupied in'. These errors, while not impeding understanding, detract from the overall accuracy and control. More careful proofreading and varied sentence structures would enhance the score.

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