Process Diagram

Band 6+: The diagram shows the process of how to make smoked fish

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Image for topic: The diagram shows the process of how to make smoked fish

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The image illustrates the process of making smoked fish: Capture fish; transport to port; freeze; thaw in fresh water; cut open; soak in mixture of saltwater and yellow coloring; smoke; freeze; transfer to cold store; distribute; and sell in fish shop.

Given the complexity of the image, the above description may not be entirely accurate.

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Note: Both the topic and the answer were created by one of our users.

The image illustrates a fourteen step process in terms of a flowchart to make smoked fish.

Overall, the process can be divided into broader categories of acquiring the fish, processing it and then distributing it. Most of the steps are represented pictorially and separated by an arrow pointing to the next step.

Initially, salmon are fished from the waterbody into a ship and transported to a port. At first, the fish is frozen and then thrown into fresh water. Following this the salmon is cut open and soaked in a mixture of yellow colouring and saltwater before being exposed to smoke. The smoked salmon is boxed, frozen to be stored in the cold storage and distributed to shops.

Word Count: 118

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Overall Band Score

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Vocabulary Complexity:
C1 - Intricate
Strive to incorporate even richer and more precise language.

Grammar Mistakes: N/A

Vocabulary Repetition:

salmon: 3

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Task Response

The report covers the requirements of the task, providing a good overview of the smoked fish production process. There is a clear introduction and a summary of the main stages. To improve, consider adding more specific details about each stage of the process. For example, you could mention the purpose of freezing the fish at different stages or elaborate on the distribution methods. The report falls short of the required 150 words.

Coherence & Cohesion

The report presents a clear overview of the smoked fish production process, logically grouping steps into broader categories. The use of 'initially,' 'following this,' and 'before' helps guide the reader through the sequence. However, transitions could be smoother in places to further enhance the flow. For example, elaborating on the purpose of certain steps (like freezing) could improve coherence. Consider using more varied cohesive devices to avoid repetition and enhance the overall readability.

Lexical Resource

The report demonstrates a good range of vocabulary related to the process, such as 'acquiring,' 'processing,' 'distributing,' 'soaked,' and 'exposed.' However, there's room to incorporate more specific or technical terms to elevate the description. For instance, instead of 'waterbody,' a more precise term like 'ocean' or 'fishing grounds' could be used. Similarly, consider using more descriptive adjectives to enhance the reader's understanding of the process.

Grammatical Range & Accuracy

The report exhibits a good command of grammar with a variety of sentence structures. The sentences are generally well-constructed and accurate. While there are a few minor errors, they do not significantly impede understanding. To further improve, focus on refining sentence structures for greater precision and conciseness. Pay attention to subject-verb agreement and correct article usage to eliminate any remaining errors.

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