Line Graph

Band 4+: The graph below describes the use of fixed telephone lines, mobile phones, and internet between 1994 and 2005 in China. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

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Image for topic: The graph below describes the use of fixed telephone lines, mobile phones, and internet between 1994 and 2005 in China. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

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The image displays a line graph showing the number of people (in millions) using three different communication methods from 1994 to 2005. For Fixed telephone lines, the user numbers were: 1994 (20), 1995 (50), 1996 (80), 1997 (120), 1998 (150), 1999 (175), 2000 (200), 2001 (250), 2002 (275), 2003 (300), 2004 (320), and 2005 (350). For Mobile phones, the numbers started in 1996 at 25, followed by: 1997 (50), 1998 (115), 1999 (140), 2000 (165), 2001 (250), 2002 (300), 2003 (350), 2004 (400), and 2005 (450). For the Internet, the data began in 1995 at 5, and continued as: 1996 (10), 1997 (50), 1998 (75), 1999 (100), 2000 (110), 2001 (125), 2002 (150), 2003 (160), 2004 (170), and 2005 (185).

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The line graph below provides the employ of fixed telephone lines, mobile phones, and internet during 1994 and 2005 in China. Overall, all categories increased dramatically at the end of period. While internet was the lowest, compared to fixed telephone lines and mobile phones.

In fist 6 years, starting at 10 million of people fixed telephone lines was slightly increased in the second year. While proportion of internet was unchanged during three years. However, the number of mobile phone was climbed up as same as fixed mobile lines with amount 150 between 1998 and 1999. Whereas, internet experienced with 50 million people over the period.

Another 6 years, the figure for fixed mobile lines went up 200 million people. Despite the figure for mobile phone dominated with 300 millions of people, while internet was just 100 in 2002s. Additionally, internet increased slightly in other years. The number of fixed mobile lines dramatically went up in each year and ended up with 450 millions of people at end of the period.

Word Count: 170

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Overall Band Score

(+/- 0.5)

Vocabulary Complexity:
B2 - Upper Intermediate
Opt for even more advanced words when appropriate.

Grammar Mistakes: N/A

Vocabulary Repetition:

mobile: 7

fixed: 6

lines: 6

internet: 6

people: 5

years: 4

telephone: 3

increased: 3

while: 3

million: 3

Try using synonyms for the above words

Task Response

The report attempts to address the task by describing the trends in the three communication methods, but it contains several inaccuracies and omissions that detract from its effectiveness. Key data points are misreported (e.g., fixed telephone lines starting at 10 million instead of 20, mobile phones ending at 450 million instead of 450, and internet figures being vague). The report also lacks a clear structure, with an unclear separation between time periods and some confusing phrasing (e.g., 'fixed mobile lines' instead of 'fixed telephone lines'). To improve, focus on accurately presenting the main trends, comparing the three categories clearly, and using precise data. Organize the report logically, perhaps by describing overall trends first, then detailing each category or time period. Ensure correct terminology and avoid vague statements like 'internet was just 100' without specifying units.

Coherence & Cohesion

The report has a basic structure with an introduction and two main paragraphs, but the progression of ideas is often unclear and difficult to follow. The use of cohesive devices is limited and sometimes inaccurate (e.g., 'While internet was the lowest, compared to fixed telephone lines and mobile phones.'). The lack of clear referencing and logical connectors makes the message hard to follow. To improve, use a clearer paragraph structure: one paragraph for the overview and one for each significant trend or time period. Use a range of linking words and phrases (e.g., 'in contrast', 'similarly', 'whereas') to show relationships between data points, and ensure each paragraph has a clear central idea.

Lexical Resource

The vocabulary is limited and repetitive, with some inappropriate word choices (e.g., 'employ' instead of 'use', 'proportion' instead of 'number', 'climbed up' instead of 'increased'). There is an attempt to use some less common vocabulary (e.g., 'dominated', 'dramatically'), but it is not always accurate or natural. To improve, learn and use a wider range of precise vocabulary for describing trends (e.g., 'soared', 'plummeted', 'levelled off', 'peaked'), and ensure word choices are appropriate for the context. Avoid informal or incorrect phrases and use more sophisticated collocations (e.g., 'witnessed a significant increase'). Pay attention to vocabulary repetition to improve the overall score.

Grammatical Range & Accuracy

The report contains numerous grammatical errors and punctuation issues that significantly impede understanding. There are problems with subject-verb agreement (e.g., 'the number of mobile phone was climbed up'), incorrect verb forms (e.g., 'was climbed up' instead of 'climbed'), and missing articles (e.g., 'at end of period'). Sentence structures are often incomplete or run-on, and there is a lack of variety. To improve, focus on mastering basic sentence structures and verb tenses (especially past simple for describing past data). Practice using a mix of simple, compound, and complex sentences, and proofread carefully to correct errors in articles, prepositions, and punctuation.

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Band 4+: The graph below describes the use of fixed telephone lines, mobile phones, and internet between 1994 and 2005 in China. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

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Task Response

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Lexical Resource

Grammatical Range & Accuracy

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The graph below describes the use of fixed telephone lines, mobile phones, and internet between 1994 and 2005 in China. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

The graph below describes the use of fixed telephone lines, mobile phones, and internet between 1994 and 2005 in China. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

The graph below describes the use of fixed telephone lines, mobile phones, and internet between 1994 and 2005 in China. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

The graph below describes the use of fixed telephone lines, mobile phones, and internet between 1994 and 2005 in China. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

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