Line Graph

Band 6+: The graph below gives information on the numbers pf participants for different activities at one social centre in Melbourne, Australia for the period 2000 to 2020 Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and ,make comparisons where relevant.

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Image for topic: The graph below gives information on the numbers pf participants for different activities at one social centre in Melbourne, Australia for the period 2000 to 2020 Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and ,make comparisons where relevant.

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The image depicts a line graph showing the number of participants in five activities from 2000-2020. In 2000, participants were: Film club (60), Martial arts (50), Amateur dramatics (20), Table tennis (40), and Musical performances (10). By 2005, Film club (60), Martial arts (40), Amateur dramatics (25), Table tennis (30), and Musical performances (20). In 2010, Film club (50), Martial arts (30), Amateur dramatics (30), Table tennis (25), Musical performances (25). By 2015, Film club (40), Martial arts (25), Amateur dramatics (35), Table tennis (20), and Musical performances (30). In 2020, the data points were Film club (45), Martial arts (20), Amateur dramatics (10), Table tennis (20), and Musical performances (55).

Given the complexity of the image, the above description may not be entirely accurate.

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Note: Both the topic and the answer were created by one of our users.

The graph shows the amount of people participated in different activities at one social centre in one of the city’s of Australia, Melbourne from 2000 to 2020. Overall, there were slight increases and decreases in some activities. While there were considerable changes in two activities, table tennis and amateur dramatics.

To begin with, the film club participants stood nearly at the same number at around 65 for the whole period with having a small change in 2010. The table tennis had a considerable increase in 2010 from 20 participants to around 50 until 2020. Moreover, the martial arts fluctuated during this period and remained at the same number under 40 participants in 2020.

Turning to the amateur dramatics, there was a slight increase from 2000 to 2005 before having a considerable decrease from 30 participants to around 5 until 2020. Additionally, there was 0 participants in the musical performance until it began to increase in 2005 and reached for 20 participants until 2020.

Word Count: 163

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Overall Band Score

(+/- 0.5)

Vocabulary Complexity:
C1 - Intricate
Strive to incorporate even richer and more precise language.

Grammar Mistakes: N/A

Vocabulary Repetition:

participants: 6

there: 4

until: 4

activities: 3

considerable: 3

around: 3

increase: 3

Try using synonyms for the above words

Task Response

The report addresses the task, but there are inaccuracies and omissions. The overview is weak. The report would benefit from a more accurate and complete description of the data, as well as a clearer overview of the main trends. For example, the report states that table tennis had a considerable increase in 2010, but the graph shows a decrease. Also, the report states that there were 0 participants in musical performance, but the graph shows 10 in 2000. The report also omits the data point in 2015.

Coherence & Cohesion

The report demonstrates an adequate attempt to organize the information, but the flow could be improved. The overall structure is present, but the transitions between ideas and paragraphs are not always smooth. Consider using more varied cohesive devices to link ideas within and between paragraphs to enhance readability. For example, using transition words like 'However,' 'Furthermore,' or 'In contrast' can help to clarify the relationships between different activities and time periods. Also, ensure that each paragraph focuses on a clear, distinct aspect of the data to improve coherence.

Lexical Resource

The vocabulary used is generally appropriate, but there's room for improvement in terms of variety and precision. The report relies on some basic vocabulary. To enhance the lexical resource, try to incorporate a wider range of synonyms and more specific terms related to trends and changes. For instance, instead of 'slight increases and decreases,' you could use 'marginal fluctuations' or 'modest variations.' Also, consider using more precise language to describe the quantities and changes observed in the graph.

Grammatical Range & Accuracy

The report contains a mix of simple and complex sentences, but there are noticeable grammatical errors that affect clarity. Pay close attention to subject-verb agreement, correct tense usage, and accurate use of articles and prepositions. Review the report carefully to identify and correct these errors. Additionally, try to vary the sentence structure to enhance the overall quality of the writing. For example, combine short sentences to create more complex ones, and use different sentence beginnings to avoid monotony.

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