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Band 4+: The graph below shows the immigration rate of three different countries from 2005 to 2020.

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Image for topic: The graph below shows the immigration rate of three different countries from 2005 to 2020.

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The image shows an immigration rate from 1960 to 2020 with: China at 10% in 1960, rising to 15% by 1980, 20% by 2000, and 27% by 2020; Japan remains nearly constant around 12% in 1960, dips slightly to 10% by 1980, then increases to 15% by 2020; Russia starts at 25% in 1960, drops sharply to 15% by 1980, continues to decline to 10% by 2000, and reaches 5% by 2020.

Given the complexity of the image, the above description may not be entirely accurate.

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The line chart illustrates the percentage of immigration in over countries (China,Japan and Russia) between 2005 and 2020.

Overall,it can be seen that while, Japan reamined stable other two countries rate changed sharply over the years.The rate of immigration constantly changed and reached its peak by China whereas the lowest rate were in the Russia.

Firstly,in 1960 China started at the lowest where Russia has the highest rate of its own, however Japan rate were between bothh of them.Russia witnessed a dramatic fall until 2000 despite this fall its slightly increased between 2000 and 2020. China sharply soared until 1980 therefore , gained more rate until 2020.Japan were the most stable country over the given period,althought this its started a little increase in 1980.

Through the years,lowest rate were in the 2000 by the rate of approximately 5% and the highest rate were in 2020 by the rate of above 25%.

Word Count: 151

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Overall Band Score

4.5

(+/- 0.5)

Vocabulary Complexity:
B1 - Intermediate
Using more sophisticated words could be beneficial.

Grammar Mistakes: N/A

Vocabulary Repetition:

between: 3

china: 3

until: 3

Try using synonyms for the above words

Task Response

The report addresses the task, but there are some inaccuracies and a lack of specific data. The organization is present, but the language contains errors. To improve, focus on providing precise data from the graph, use more accurate language, and ensure correct grammar and sentence structure.

Coherence & Cohesion

The report lacks a clear structure and logical flow. The information is not presented in a coherent manner, making it difficult to follow the trends and comparisons between the countries. Paragraphing is weak, and the overall organization needs improvement. Consider grouping information by country or by time period to enhance clarity. Use cohesive devices more effectively to link ideas and sentences.

Lexical Resource

The vocabulary used is basic and lacks precision. There is limited use of specific terms related to describing trends and changes in immigration rates. The repetition of words like 'rate' and 'changed' indicates a need for a broader range of vocabulary. Try to incorporate more varied and descriptive language to enhance the report's impact. Boost vocabulary complexity to elevate the overall score.

Grammatical Range & Accuracy

The report contains numerous grammatical errors, including incorrect verb tenses, subject-verb agreement issues, and punctuation mistakes. Sentence structure is often awkward and unclear. These errors significantly impede understanding. Focus on improving your understanding of basic grammar rules and sentence construction to enhance accuracy.

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