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Band 5+: The graph show the energy consumption and emission of greenhouse gases from Australian household.

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Image for topic: The graph show the energy consumption and emission of greenhouse gases from Australian household.

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The image contains two pie charts titled "Australian household energy use" and "Australian household greenhouse gas emissions". The first chart shows different categories with heating at 42%, water heating 30%, refrigeration 7%, other appliances 15%, lighting 4%, and cooling 2%. The second chart has categories with heating at 15%, water heating 32%, refrigeration 14%, other appliances 28%, lighting 8%, and cooling 3%.

Given the complexity of the image, the above description may not be entirely accurate.

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The two pie chart illustrate the ways energy is used and how much gas of greenhouse released into environment for every family in Australia.

Overall , heating accounts of the largest percentage of energy use, while water – heating makes up the highest percentage of greenhouse gas emissions.

Regarding energy consumption, heating takes up the highest percentage at 42%, follow by water heating which accounts for 30%, other appliances around 15%. Besides, the majority of water heating releases a large amount of greenhouse – gases into environment with 32%, other appliances account for 28%, at the medium level are heating and refrigeration around 14 and 15%.

Additionally, refrigeration falls at 7%. Energy that families in Australia use less are cooling and lighting only 2 and 4 percent. It’s also energy discharged least into environment.

It is clear that, heating is the energy used most by people but their gas volume isn’t high, water heating is nearly no difference. In contrast, other appliances and refrigeration released a quite large number into environment.

Word Count: 171

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Overall Band Score

5.5

(+/- 0.5)

Vocabulary Complexity:
C2 - Complex
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Grammar Mistakes: N/A

Vocabulary Repetition:

heating: 8

energy: 6

water: 4

greenhouse: 3

environment: 3

percentage: 3

other: 3

appliances: 3

refrigeration: 3

Try using synonyms for the above words

Task Response

The report covers the requirements of the task, providing a general overview of the data and highlighting key trends. However, there are some omissions and areas where the analysis could be more precise. To improve, focus on providing more specific comparisons and avoid generalizations. Also, ensure that all significant data points are mentioned and accurately represented.

Coherence & Cohesion

The report demonstrates an adequate attempt to organize the information, but the flow could be improved. The organization into paragraphs is present, but the connections between sentences and ideas within paragraphs sometimes feel disjointed. Transitions could be used more effectively to guide the reader through the data. For example, in the third paragraph, the shift from energy consumption to greenhouse gas emissions could be smoother. The final paragraph attempts to summarize but lacks precision and clarity.

Lexical Resource

The vocabulary used is generally appropriate but lacks sophistication and precision. There is some repetition of basic words and phrases (e.g., 'percentage,' 'energy,' 'heating'). The report would benefit from a wider range of vocabulary to describe the data and trends more accurately. For instance, instead of repeatedly using 'accounts for,' consider using synonyms like 'constitutes,' 'represents,' or 'comprises.' Also, try to use more specific language related to energy consumption and emissions.

Grammatical Range & Accuracy

The report contains several grammatical errors that affect clarity. Some examples include incorrect verb forms ('heating accounts of'), missing articles ('into environment'), and awkward phrasing ('their gas volume isn't high'). While the report demonstrates an understanding of basic sentence structures, there is a need for greater accuracy and control. Pay close attention to subject-verb agreement, article usage, and correct preposition usage. Proofreading carefully for these errors will improve the overall quality of the writing.

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Band 5+: The graph show the energy consumption and emission of greenhouse gases from Australian household.

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Overall Band Score

Task Response

Coherence & Cohesion

Lexical Resource

Grammatical Range & Accuracy

Answers On The Same Topic:

The graph show the energy consumption and emission of greenhouse gases from Australian household.

The graph show the energy consumption and emission of greenhouse gases from Australian household.

The graph show the energy consumption and emission of greenhouse gases from Australian household.

The graph show the energy consumption and emission of greenhouse gases from Australian household.

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