Line Graph

Band 5+: The graphs below show the percentage of graduates that got full-time jobs after graduating from a university in UK, and the average salary of both these types of graduates, from 2004 to 2012. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

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Image for topic: The graphs below show the percentage of graduates that got full-time jobs after graduating from a university in UK, and the average salary of both these types of graduates, from 2004 to 2012. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

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The image contains a line graph titled 'Graduate Employment & Salary Trends (2004-2012)' tracking two metrics. The values for 'Full-time Jobs (%)' are: 2004, 75; 2005, 73; 2006, 70; 2007, 68; 2008, 66; 2009, 64; 2010, 65; 2011, 67; and 2012, 69. The values for 'Average Salary (£)' are: 2004, 25000; 2005, 25500; 2006, 26200; 2007, 26800; 2008, 27400; 2009, 27100; 2010, 27800; 2011, 28200; and 2012, 29000.

Given the complexity of the image, the above description may not be entirely accurate.

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Note: Both the topic and the answer were created by one of our users.

The line graph illustrates the proportion of graduates that got full-time employment after finishing from a university in UK, and the approximate wages of both these types of graduates between 2004 and 2012.

Overall, the proportion of full-time jobs recorded highest during the first year, and made a significant decrease in 2009, eventually rose through the following years. In terms of average salary, the figures use were pound sterling and in the early year, it made a steadily increase throughout without dropping.

In 2004, it’s the peaked year of employment, having above 74% and an average of 25,000 pounds, before the mid-year, the employment drops to 68% with 26,500 pounds, gradually, the lowest percent recorded was in year 2009 in contrast to the average salary who never decline. Eventually in 2010 to 2012, the employment rate of full-time slowly increase again and recorded as the highest average salary of 29,000 pounds in 2012.

Word Count: 153

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Overall Band Score

5.5

(+/- 0.5)

Vocabulary Complexity:
C1 - Intricate
Strive to incorporate even richer and more precise language.

Grammar Mistakes: N/A

Vocabulary Repetition:

employment: 4

average: 4

full-time: 3

recorded: 3

salary: 3

pounds: 3

Try using synonyms for the above words

Task Response

The report addresses the task by describing the main trends in both the percentage of graduates in full-time jobs and their average salary. It provides an overview and some specific data points. However, there are several inaccuracies and omissions: the employment percentage is not accurately reported (e.g., it states 74% in 2004, but the actual is 75%; it mentions a drop to 68% in the mid-year, but the actual is 68% in 2007; it says the lowest was in 2009, which is correct, but the value is 64%, not mentioned). The salary data is also imprecise (e.g., it says 26,500 pounds in the mid-year, but the actual is 26,200 in 2006). Additionally, the report lacks a clear comparison between the two metrics and does not fully cover the entire period. To improve, ensure accurate data representation, include specific figures for key points, and make explicit comparisons between the trends.

Coherence & Cohesion

The report has a clear overall structure with an introduction and an overview, but the body paragraph lacks clear organization and logical progression. The description of trends is somewhat disjointed, and the use of cohesive devices is limited. To improve, ensure that each paragraph focuses on a clear aspect (e.g., one paragraph for employment percentage, another for salary) and use a range of linking words and phrases to connect ideas smoothly.

Lexical Resource

The vocabulary used is adequate for the task, with some attempts at variety (e.g., 'proportion', 'approximate wages', 'peaked year'). However, there are inaccuracies and awkward phrasings such as 'the figures use were pound sterling' and 'made a steadily increase'. To improve, use more precise and natural vocabulary, and ensure correct word forms (e.g., 'a steady increase' instead of 'a steadily increase').

Grammatical Range & Accuracy

The report contains several grammatical errors and punctuation issues that affect clarity. Examples include 'the figures use were' (should be 'the figures used were'), 'it's the peaked year' (should be 'it was the peak year'), and 'who never decline' (should be 'which never declined'). There is also inconsistent tense usage. To improve, focus on subject-verb agreement, correct verb forms, and consistent use of past tense for describing past data. Additionally, ensure sentences are complete and properly punctuated.

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