Pie Chart

Band 7+: The pie charts illustrate leisure time between boys and girls

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The image shows two pie charts: the first details boys' cultural and leisure activities, with reading at 2%, computer games at 34%, skateboarding at 11%, listening to music at 10%, soccer at 17%, and basketball at 26%; the second details girls' cultural and leisure activities, with reading at 21%, computer games at 16%, netball at 15%, listening to music at 10%, gymnastics at 20%, and dancing at 27%.

Given the complexity of the image, the above description may not be entirely accurate.

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The pie charts illustrate the rate of participation in different cultural and leisure activities among girls and boys.

Overall, it is clear that while boys dominate in computer games, dancing takes up the highest proportion among the girls. Another striking point is that reading takes up negligible proportion among boys, whereas listening to music is the least popular activity for girls.

In detail, the proportion of boys playing computer games is double that of soccer at 34% and 17%, respectively. On the other hand, listening to music and skateboarding constitute similar figures at 10% and 11%, which are followed by basketball, standing at 26%. As regards reading, it only makes up a negligible proportion at 2%.

When it comes to girls’ cultural and leisure activities, dancing ranked first at 27%. Moreover, netball and computer games differ by only 1 percentage point at 15% and 16%, respectively. Likewise, listening to music and gymnastics share identical proportions at 10% and 11%. Dancing accounts for second the most popular activity among females at just under 30%.

Word Count: 173

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Overall Band Score

7.5

(+/- 0.5)

Vocabulary Complexity:
C1 - Intricate
Strive to incorporate even richer and more precise language.

Grammar Mistakes: N/A

Vocabulary Repetition:

among: 4

proportion: 4

computer: 3

games: 3

dancing: 3

listening: 3

music: 3

Try using synonyms for the above words

Task Response

The report effectively addresses the task by providing an overview and detailed comparisons of the activities for both genders. The overall structure is clear, and the key trends are highlighted. However, there are a few minor inaccuracies and inconsistencies: the statement about 'listening to music and gymnastics share identical proportions' is incorrect (10% vs 20%), and the final sentence about dancing being 'second the most popular' contradicts the earlier statement that it is the highest. Additionally, the phrase 'rate of participation' could be more precise as 'proportion of time' or 'percentage of leisure time.' To improve, ensure all data points are accurately reported and maintain consistency in the description of rankings.

Coherence & Cohesion

The report is well-organized with a clear overall statement and logical paragraphing. The use of cohesive devices (e.g., 'Overall', 'In detail', 'When it comes to') helps the reader follow the description effortlessly. However, there is a minor lapse in coherence in the final sentence, where 'Dancing accounts for second the most popular activity' contradicts the earlier statement that dancing is the highest proportion. This creates a slight confusion. Ensure that all statements align with the data and maintain logical consistency throughout.

Lexical Resource

The vocabulary is varied and appropriate for the task, with good use of synonyms and precise terms (e.g., 'proportion', 'constitute', 'ranked first', 'negligible'). The phrasing is generally natural and sophisticated. To improve, consider using more advanced collocations and avoid repetition (e.g., 'proportion' is used multiple times). Also, ensure that phrases like 'takes up the highest proportion' are used accurately. Overall, the lexical resource is strong, but there is room for more variety and precision.

Grammatical Range & Accuracy

The report demonstrates a good range of grammatical structures, including comparative forms, passive constructions, and complex sentences. However, there are a few grammatical errors and awkward phrasings that affect accuracy. For example, 'Dancing accounts for second the most popular activity' is grammatically incorrect and should be rephrased. Additionally, 'the proportion of boys playing computer games is double that of soccer' is slightly ambiguous; it would be clearer to say 'double the proportion of soccer'. Minor punctuation and article issues are also present. With careful proofreading, the grammatical accuracy can be improved to a higher band.

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Band 7+: The pie charts illustrate leisure time between boys and girls

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The pie charts illustrate leisure time between boys and girls

The pie charts illustrate leisure time between boys and girls

The pie charts illustrate leisure time between boys and girls

The pie charts illustrate leisure time between boys and girls

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