Pie Chart

Band 6+: The pie charts show the percentage of China mobile media/entertainment time spent between March 2016 and March 2018.

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The image displays China mobile media/entertainment daily time spent for March 2016 with total time of 2.0B hours segmented as: social networking 60%, video 13%, game 13%, news 7%, audio 4%, reading 3% and for March 2018 total time of 3.2B hours revealing a 22% year-over-year increase, segmented as: social networking 47%, video 22%, game 13%, news 11%, reading 3%, audio 4%.

Given the complexity of the image, the above description may not be entirely accurate.

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The pie charts demonstrate the average percentage of China mobile entertainment time spend in March 2016 and March 2018.

Overall the most striking aspect is this figure is that social networking accounted for the highest percentage of media of both years.while reading generally at the lowest ratio of both years.

To begin with the figure for social networking was the highest at 6% ,in March 2016. Video and games at 13%. Similarly the proportion of news representated 7% while audio and reading contributed 4% and 3% respectively.

However by March 2018 the total time had surgef to 3.2 billion hours, making a 22% year over year increase. The share of social networking dropped to 47%, wild video expanded 22%. Moreover, dramatically News rose to 11%. Meanwhile , the proportion of games stood at just 13% in both years. Furthermore, the ratio of audio and reading the lowest and not changed over the years, 4% and 3% respectively.

Word Count: 157

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Overall Band Score

(+/- 0.5)

Vocabulary Complexity:
B2 - Upper Intermediate
Opt for even more advanced words when appropriate.

Grammar Mistakes: N/A

Vocabulary Repetition:

march: 4

social: 3

networking: 3

reading: 3

Try using synonyms for the above words

Task Response

The report effectively addresses the task by presenting an overview and key details of the pie charts. It correctly identifies the main trend (social networking highest, reading lowest) and includes specific data for both years. However, there are minor inaccuracies (e.g., '6%' for social networking in 2016 instead of 60%) and some grammatical errors (e.g., 'surgef', 'wild video', 'representated') that slightly affect clarity. To improve, ensure accurate data representation and proofread for grammatical precision.

Coherence & Cohesion

The report has a clear overall structure with an introduction, overview, and two main paragraphs. However, the flow is sometimes disrupted by awkward phrasing and punctuation errors (e.g., missing spaces after commas, run-on sentences). The overview could be more clearly separated from the details. To improve, ensure each paragraph has a clear central topic and use cohesive devices more effectively to link ideas within and between sentences.

Lexical Resource

The vocabulary is adequate for the task, with some good attempts at paraphrasing (e.g., 'demonstrate', 'accounted for', 'contributed'). However, there are several word choice and collocation issues (e.g., 'time spend' should be 'time spent', 'surgef' should be 'surged', 'wild video' should be 'while video'). To improve, use more precise and natural vocabulary, and ensure correct word forms and collocations.

Grammatical Range & Accuracy

The report attempts a range of sentence structures, but there are numerous grammatical errors that affect clarity. Examples include subject-verb agreement ('the total time had surgef' should be 'had surged'), incorrect verb forms ('representated' should be 'represented'), and punctuation issues (missing spaces after commas, run-on sentences). To improve, focus on proofreading for common errors and practice using a variety of complex structures accurately.

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