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Band 5+: The table below shows passenger statistics reported by four cruise ship companies from 1985 to 2015. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

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Image for topic: The table below shows passenger statistics reported by four cruise ship companies from 1985 to 2015. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

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The image contains a table titled 'Cruise ship passenger statistics over 30 years' showing passenger numbers for four companies across the years 1985, 1995, 2005, and 2015. The statistics are listed as follows: Queen of Seas had 450,000, 428,000, 403,000, and 422,000 passengers for the respective years. Caribbean Dream had 215,000, 256,000, 220,000, and 245,000. Voyage World had 345,000, 396,000, 398,000, and 362,000. Sunny Sail had 412,000, 423,000, 399,000, and 403,000.

Given the complexity of the image, the above description may not be entirely accurate.

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The picture illustrates the information about a number of passenger reported by four different cruise ship companies between 1985 and 2015.

As an overall trend, we can observe that Queen of Seas was the most successful company throughout the entire period, meanwhile Caribbean Dream depicts opposite trend with the lowest rate.

Looking at the indicator of Queen Seas Company, which had the most outstanding results with 450000 initially, nevertheless there was fluctuation from 428 000 in 1995 to 422 000 in 2015. The main opposite to the leader of table data was Caribbean Dream cruise, which had the lowest amount of riderships among other corporations as well as this company wasn’t able to maintain stable index of people on ship, in addition they also had a significant decrease in visit statistics from 256 000 in 1995 to 220 000 in 2005. Moreover, the table chart represents constant ratings too. The Voyage World and Sunny Sail presented golden average indicators of commuters on their vacations all over the time since 1985 to 2015.

Word Count: 172

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Overall Band Score

5.5

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Vocabulary Complexity:
C1 - Intricate
Strive to incorporate even richer and more precise language.

Grammar Mistakes: N/A

Vocabulary Repetition:

company: 3

Try using synonyms for the above words

Task Response

The report addresses the main requirements of the task by identifying the highest and lowest performing companies and noting some trends. However, the overview is somewhat limited, and the description of the data lacks precision. For instance, describing Voyage World and Sunny Sail as having 'golden average indicators' is imprecise and non-academic; it would be better to describe their specific trends or relative positions. Additionally, while some fluctuations are mentioned, the report would benefit from more direct comparisons between the companies and a clearer summary of the overall patterns across the 30-year period.

Coherence & Cohesion

The report attempts to organize information into paragraphs, but the progression of ideas is sometimes difficult to follow. The use of cohesive devices is somewhat repetitive or used incorrectly (e.g., 'Looking at the indicator of...', 'The main opposite to...'). To improve, focus on using logical transitions that connect the trends of different companies more smoothly. Avoid long, run-on sentences; instead, use a variety of linking words like 'In contrast,' 'Similarly,' or 'While' to create a more natural flow between observations.

Lexical Resource

There is an attempt to use varied vocabulary (e.g., 'riderships', 'corporations', 'commuters'), but many terms are used inappropriately in this context. For example, 'golden average indicators' and 'stable index of people' are not natural collocations for describing statistical data. Additionally, 'the picture illustrates' is better suited for a graph or diagram than a table. Aim to use more precise academic language for data description, such as 'fluctuated,' 'remained relatively stable,' or 'experienced a decline.'

Grammatical Range & Accuracy

The report contains several grammatical errors that occasionally hinder clarity. There are issues with sentence structure, particularly with comma splices and run-on sentences (e.g., the long sentence starting with 'The main opposite to...'). There are also errors in article usage and prepositional phrases. To improve, practice constructing complex sentences using subordinate clauses (e.g., 'Although Queen of Seas started with the highest number, it experienced a downward trend...') and ensure that subject-verb agreement is consistent throughout.

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