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Band 5+: The table below shows the worldwide market share of the mobile phone market for manufacturers in the years 2005 and 2006.

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The image presents a table of worldwide mobile phone sales expressed as percent market share for the years 2005 and 2006. In 2005: Nokia with 32.5%, Motorola with 17.7%, Samsung 12.7%, Sony Ericsson 6.3%, L.G. 6.7%, BenQ Mobile 4.9%, Others 19.2%, totaling 100%. In 2006: Nokia with 35%, Motorola with 21.1%, Samsung 11.8%, Sony Ericsson 7.4%, L.G. 6.3%, BenQ Mobile 2.4%, Others 16.2%, totaling 100%.

Given the complexity of the image, the above description may not be entirely accurate.

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The table illustrates global trade of the smartphone shared by manufacturers between the years of 2005 and 2006.

Generally, between the years percentage of phone sales in companies Nokia, Motorola and Sony Ericsson rose while proportion in other brands fall. Likewise, Nokia and BendQ mobile phones have stayed as a brand with the highest and lowest percent in both of the years respectively.

It is evident that Nokia had the highest percentage with 32.5% in 2005 between other types of phones. It followed by other brands, Motorola and Samsung showing 19.5%, 17.7% and 12.7% respectively. However, brands such as L.G., Sony Ericsson and BenQ mobile showed nearly twice less than this with 6.7%, 6.3% and 4.9% respectively.

As can be seen from the table some mobile phone’s percentages increased in 2006 showing for around 1-4% more than in 2005. For instance, Nokia, Motorola and Sony Ericson had 35%, 21% and 7.4 % respectively. However, Samsung, L.G, and BenQ mobiles experienced decrease showing a bit less percentages with 11.8%, 6.3% and 2.4% respectively.

Word Count: 172

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Overall Band Score

5.5

(+/- 0.5)

Vocabulary Complexity:
B1 - Intermediate
Using more sophisticated words could be beneficial.

Grammar Mistakes: N/A

Vocabulary Repetition:

nokia: 4

between: 3

years: 3

motorola: 3

other: 3

brands: 3

mobile: 3

showing: 3

respectively: 3

Try using synonyms for the above words

Task Response

The report adequately covers the data, noting key trends and changes between 2005 and 2006. However, there are some inaccuracies in the data reported (e.g. 'other brands, Motorola and Samsung showing 19.5%, 17.7% and 12.7% respectively'). To improve, ensure all data cited is accurate and consider a more structured overview in the introduction and conclusion.

Coherence & Cohesion

The report demonstrates an adequate attempt to organize the information, but the flow could be improved. The introduction is acceptable, but the overview could be more concise and impactful. The body paragraphs present data, but the connections between sentences and ideas are not always smooth, leading to some choppiness. Consider using transition words and phrases to link ideas more effectively and improve the overall coherence.

Lexical Resource

The vocabulary used is generally appropriate, but there's room for improvement in terms of variety and precision. The report relies on basic vocabulary. Try to incorporate a wider range of synonyms and more specific terms to describe the data and trends. This will enhance the sophistication and impact of your writing. Boost vocabulary complexity to elevate the overall score.

Grammatical Range & Accuracy

The report contains a number of grammatical errors and phrasing issues that affect clarity. While the basic sentence structures are present, there are errors in verb tense, subject-verb agreement, and article usage. There are also instances of awkward phrasing that make the report difficult to understand. Focus on improving your understanding of basic grammar rules and sentence construction to enhance the accuracy and clarity of your writing.

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