Letter

Band 5+: You are planning to move to a new city for work and need to find accommodation. Write a letter to a local real estate agency. - Explain your situation and the type of accommodation you are looking for. - Describe your preferred location and budget. - Ask about their fees and the process for viewing properties.

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Dear Sir/Madam,

I hope you are doing great, the purpose of my letter to inform you that I freshly moved to a new city for work, but I am facing trouble searching appropriate accommodation.

I am searching for a budget friendly flat or room because, I am new here and lack of money. The room or flat must be furnish and have kitchen with it also laundry area should be included.

Right now, I am living on sharing with two university girls, these girls are very rude and aggressive also included in some illegal activities. They smoke weed and ice and make noice in room while I am sleeping and I can not sleep properly also rent is very high, I can not afford anymore.

The specific asistance I need from you is to get me a flat or room as on my demand in a low budget.

I look forward to your response.

Yours faithfully,

Hira

Word Count: 157

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Overall Band Score

(+/- 0.5)

Vocabulary Complexity:
B1 - Intermediate
Using more sophisticated words could be beneficial.

Grammar Mistakes: N/A

Vocabulary Repetition:
No noticeable repetition! Great job!

Task Response

The letter addresses all three bullet points required by the task. However, the development of these points is somewhat limited. While the reasons for the current difficulty are clear, the description of the specific help needed is quite brief and repetitive. To improve, try to expand on your requests - for example, instead of just asking for a low-budget room, you could ask the agent to schedule viewings or provide a list of available properties that meet your criteria. Additionally, ensure that the tone remains professional; while describing difficult roommates is necessary, using overly informal or blunt language can detract from the formal nature of a letter to a professional agent.

Coherence & Cohesion

The letter follows the required structure and addresses all three bullet points from the task. However, the progression of ideas is somewhat disjointed due to poor sentence connectivity. Many sentences are 'run-on' sentences (multiple ideas joined by commas without proper conjunctions or full stops). To improve, use a wider variety of cohesive devices such as 'Furthermore,' 'Consequently,' or 'Due to these circumstances' to link your thoughts more smoothly.

Lexical Resource

The vocabulary used is basic and functional, which allows the reader to understand the message, but it lacks the sophistication required for higher bands. There are several errors in word choice and form (e.g., 'lack of money' instead of 'limited budget', 'furnish' instead of 'furnished', and 'noice' instead of 'noise'). Try to use more professional real estate terminology, such as 'amenities,' 'residential area,' or 'affordable housing options.'

Grammatical Range & Accuracy

Grammatical errors are frequent and occasionally impede the flow of reading. There are significant issues with subject-verb agreement, tense, and sentence structure. For example, 'the purpose of my letter to inform you' is missing the verb 'is', and 'I am living on sharing' should be 'I am sharing a room'. Additionally, punctuation is often used incorrectly, particularly the use of commas where full stops are required. Focus on mastering simple and compound sentence structures before attempting complex ones.

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