Discussion

Band 6+: 📝TASK 2: Many parents and teachers think it is important to supervise children's activities. Others argue they should have freedom. Discuss the both sides and give your opinion.

See all user-written essays on this topic

Skyrocket your IELTS band score by 1-2 points in under a month with our premium plan!

Note: Both the topic and the essay were created by one of our users.

In contemporary society, there is an on going debate whether parents should look after their kids or letting them do as they please. In this essay I am going to evaluate both sides of the argument and give my thoughts on the given statement.

In some cases, it is good for the parents to be aware of what the children are up to because they want to ensure their safety. Especially after knowing what is going on on social media platforms, if children were left in such a dangerous and unsupervised space, they would be exposed to explicit and violent content. And since kids tend to imitate what they see on the internet, they could harm themselves when there are no supervision from the family.

However, the argument above is only right to some extend. Children may experienced negative emotions when their parents are being too control towards them. These feelings, after a long period of time, may evolve into something more serious, which can harm the children physically and mentally. Following this, they may suffer from mental disoder such as depression from being confined and feeling lonely under strict parental supervision. In contrast, children who were given more freedom, would behave differently. Since they are free to do anything as long as the activity is appropriate and harmless, the teenagers receive numerous benefits. Firstly, they become more sociable and friendly towards their family and friends as they do not view their mom and dad as too obessive and controlling. Secondly, giving them the freedom they need also strengthen the family bond, result in less family conflicts and arguments.

In conclusion, both schools of thought have its pros and cons. For instance, being able to control the kids activity can ensure their safety while giving them freedom lead to a decrease in arguments between family members. In my own perspective, I believe that parents should find a balance point between the two given aspects in order to be able to educate children about the danger in the outside world and make sure not confining them.

Word Count: 345

Check Your Own Essay On This Topic?

Check My Essay

Generate A Band-9 Sample With Your Idea?

Generate A Sample

Overall Band Score

(+/- 0.5)

Vocabulary Complexity:
C1 - Intricate
Strive to incorporate even richer and more precise language.

Grammar Mistakes: N/A

Vocabulary Repetition:

their: 6

children: 6

parents: 4

family: 4

going: 3

after: 3

given: 3

being: 3

freedom: 3

Try using synonyms for the above words

Task Response

The essay addresses all parts of the prompt. You have discussed both the benefits of close supervision (safety/protection from online content) and the benefits of freedom (mental health/social skills/family bonds). Your personal opinion is clearly stated in the conclusion, suggesting a balanced approach. To improve, ensure that your position is more clearly integrated throughout the essay rather than just appearing at the end. While your ideas are relevant, some of the development could be more precise; for example, the transition between the dangers of supervision and the benefits of freedom could be smoother. Additionally, pay attention to grammatical accuracy (e.g., 'too control' should be 'too controlling', 'mental disoder' should be 'mental disorders', and 'both schools of thought have its' should be 'have their') to ensure that minor errors do not distract the reader from your arguments.

Coherence & Cohesion

The essay follows a logical structure, with a clear introduction, body paragraphs addressing both sides, and a conclusion. However, the transition between ideas could be smoother. Some cohesive devices are used, but they occasionally feel mechanical or are used slightly incorrectly (e.g., 'Following this' is used to link psychological consequences, but the connection could be more nuanced). To improve, focus on using a wider variety of linking words and ensure that each paragraph has a clear, singular topic sentence that guides the reader through your argument.

Lexical Resource

You have used a sufficient range of vocabulary to discuss the topic, such as 'explicit and violent content,' 'imitate,' and 'strict parental supervision.' However, there are several instances of word form errors and imprecise phrasing (e.g., 'too control' instead of 'too controlling,' 'mental disoder,' and 'obessive'). To reach a higher band, aim for greater precision in word choice and ensure that adjectives and nouns are used in their correct forms. Try to avoid repetitive phrasing and use more sophisticated collocations. Boost vocabulary complexity to elevate the overall score.

Grammatical Range & Accuracy

The essay demonstrates an attempt to use complex sentence structures, such as conditional sentences ('if children were left... they would be exposed'). However, there are frequent grammatical errors that occasionally hinder the flow of reading. Issues include subject-verb agreement ('there are no supervision' should be 'there is no supervision'), tense consistency ('Children may experienced' should be 'may experience'), and article usage. I recommend reviewing basic grammar rules regarding verb tenses, singular/plural agreement, and the correct use of gerunds versus infinitives.

Essays On The Same Topic:

📝TASK 2: Many parents and teachers think it is important to supervise children’s activities. Others argue they should have freedom. Discuss the both sides and give your opinion.

People hold different views about whether children should be guided or given independence. While I acknowledge the benefits of freedom – building self-confidence and responsibility – I believe supervision is important as it prevents bad habits and negative influence. On the one hand, being independent can be seen as a practical and useful approach for […]

Band 5+

📝TASK 2: Many parents and teachers think it is important to supervise children’s activities. Others argue they should have freedom. Discuss the both sides and give your opinion.

Some people suppose that the control of children activities is primary, while others argued that children should have more freedom and independence. This essay discusses both views, however I think that parents should find the compromises with children. On the one hand, some parents tend to restrict their children in the choice of activities, because […]

Band 5+

📝TASK 2: Many parents and teachers think it is important to supervise children’s activities. Others argue they should have freedom. Discuss the both sides and give your opinion.

The ongoing debate regarding supervising children’s activities is necessary versus children should have freedom has captured interest. Both options present clear advantages and are favored for different reasons depending on individual preferences. I agree that some control is necessary, but children should also be given space to learn independently. I will explore former options. One […]

Band 6+

📝TASK 2: Many parents and teachers think it is important to supervise children’s activities. Others argue they should have freedom. Discuss the both sides and give your opinion.

Nowadays many parents and teachers of the students think that activities of the children must be controlled. However there are some people who believe that children must raise-up being free. In my view, both sides have valid points, and a balanced approach is necessary. Those who support the idea that children must be strict controlled […]

Band 5+

See All

Many animals are facing extinction in the wild. Why is this happening? What can be done to protect them?

Numerous animal species are currently facing the threat of extinction in the wild, which is occurring due to a combination of severe environmental factors. I firmly believe that human activities, such as intensive agriculture, rapid urbanization, and heavy manufacturing, are the primary drivers of this crisis. Additionally, climate change continues to alter natural environments worldwide, […]

Band 9

To improve children's family life, should adults participate in a course on parenting and child development every year?

Nowadays, the issue of whether parents should participate in a course on improving child development and parenting has became a matter of cansiderable debate. While some people may have different opinions about this issue, I completely argee with the statement that family members should participate in a cource. In this essay, I will explain the […]

Band 4+

Some people say that now we can see films on our phones or tablets, and there is no need to go to the cinema. Others say that to be fully enjoyed, films need to be seen in a cinema.

In today’s rapidly evolving world, there are two different views regarding watching movies. Some assert that watching films on portable digital devices is greater convenient than going to the cinema. Others, however, argue that cinemas give them a sense of enjoyment and excitement. From my personal perspective, while using digital devices has made watching videos […]

Band 6+

Some people think that close friendships are built on having similar interests and opinions. Others believe that differences between friends make relationships stronger. Discuss both views and give your opinion.

Some individuals believe that true and devoted friendships are sustained due to having the same beliefs and perspectives on life, while others emphasize the importance of differences within the relationships. Personally, I think that both views are equally important to cultivate strong friendships. Sharing similar perspectives and core values is the essential part of maintaining […]

Band 7+

See All

Check Your Own Essay On This Topic?

Generate A Band-9 Sample With Your Idea?

Overall Band Score

Task Response

Coherence & Cohesion

Lexical Resource

Grammatical Range & Accuracy

Essays On The Same Topic:

Other Topics:

Plans & Pricing

Free

Premium