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Band 5+: Discuss the advantages and disadvantages of living and working in a foreign country

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Nowadays, the majority of people are prefer to go to foreign nations to working or studying for a long periods. People have different arguments about going to abroad, some consider that there are a lot of advantages of doing this, while other insist that they can face several challenges in the foreign countries. In my opinion, living abroad can be more benefits for people for the reasons that they can make new friends and contacts and a chance to study in high-rate universities.

The lack of awareness law rules and struggle to find well-paid jobs can be main motives why people believe it is harmful. For a start, some nations have strict law-rules these days. For example, in the Saudi Arabia, in spite of getting high salary, many people do not want to working there. Because of this, There are quite serious rules, including, driving vehicles lower speed and do not show any unacceptable emotions around the nation. If they break any rules, there is $1000 at least fine to person. Moreover, a lot of people are facing difficulties at find occupations even they move to a larger urban area. For instance, South Korea, one of the most developed country in the world these days. People can get worker visa more easily compared to other countries, yet there are major competition to obtain job.

Despite the arguments mentioned that I believe living foreign nations have unbelievable benefits. Firstly, if they go to foreign nations to study, they have new course mates and teachers and other. They may help to them to try new things in this nation and also they would have international friends. For instance, it help them to trip to around the world more easily so that they can exchange culture with each others. Secondly, the majority of graduates would like to study in abroad universities since they have opportunities to get a high-quality education and also high-reputation’s university degree. This can be good example, they are able to find high salary occupations through university degree. Because of this, many companies leader’s are want to get a worker with genius and high-knowledge these days.

In conclusion, it is my firm viewpoint that living foreign nations are good, nowadays, but they must gather more data about going nation’s. This is because, they would not face challenges after arrived.

Word Count: 389

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Overall Band Score

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Vocabulary Complexity:
C1 - Intricate
Strive to incorporate even richer and more precise language.

Grammar Mistakes: N/A

Vocabulary Repetition:

people: 7

foreign: 5

nations: 5

there: 5

abroad: 3

other: 3

living: 3

study: 3

rules: 3

these: 3

because: 3

would: 3

Try using synonyms for the above words

Task Response

The essay addresses both advantages and disadvantages of living and working abroad, but the development is uneven. The position is clear, yet the supporting ideas are often limited, repetitive, and lack sufficient explanation. Some points are relevant, but the language errors and unclear examples reduce overall clarity. To improve, focus on fully developing each main idea with specific, relevant examples, and ensure grammatical accuracy to convey meaning more effectively.

Coherence & Cohesion

The essay has a clear overall structure with an introduction, two body paragraphs, and a conclusion. However, the logical flow is often disrupted by grammatical errors and awkward phrasing, making some parts difficult to follow. For example, the use of 'Despite the arguments mentioned that I believe' is confusing. Cohesive devices are used but sometimes incorrectly (e.g., 'For a start', 'Because of this'). Paragraphing is present but not always skillfully managed; the second body paragraph mixes advantages and disadvantages. To improve, focus on clear topic sentences, ensure each paragraph has a single main idea, and use cohesive devices accurately. Proofreading for grammar would also enhance coherence.

Lexical Resource

The vocabulary used is adequate for the task but limited in range. There is some repetition (e.g., 'high salary', 'high-quality', 'high-reputation'). Attempts at less common words (e.g., 'unbelievable benefits', 'genius and high-knowledge') are sometimes inappropriate or incorrectly used. Phrasal errors like 'awareness law rules' and 'high-rate universities' hinder clarity. To improve, expand your vocabulary with more precise and natural collocations, and use synonyms to avoid repetition. Reading more academic texts can help you acquire appropriate lexical items. Boost vocabulary complexity to elevate the overall score.

Grammatical Range & Accuracy

There are frequent grammatical errors that cause strain for the reader. These include subject-verb agreement (e.g., 'people are prefer'), incorrect verb forms (e.g., 'to working', 'do not want to working'), article errors (e.g., 'in the Saudi Arabia'), preposition errors (e.g., 'at find'), and sentence structure issues (e.g., 'Despite the arguments mentioned that I believe'). Punctuation is also inconsistent (e.g., comma splices, incorrect capitalization). To improve, review basic grammar rules, practice constructing simple and complex sentences accurately, and proofread your work carefully. Consider using a grammar checker and revising your writing multiple times.

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