Discussion

Band 7+: Some people feel that governments should take a large proportion of people's salaries to pay for necessary public services such as schools and roads. Other feel that high taxes are a bad thin. Discuss both views and give your own opinion

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People have different views about whether the administration should take a huge percentage of dwellers’ income to pay for public facilities, or whether it’s a bad idea to take excessive tax from citizens. In this essay, I am going to discuss both sides before presenting my own opinion.

Those who believe that the government should take people’s income for running public facilities provide some reasons to support their view. One of the most obvious reasons is that they think by taking tax from the dwellers, especially rich ones, the administration can invest this money in the country’s development and enhance public facilities. For example, in Bangladesh, many business tycoons have huge illegal amounts of money, and they are smuggling their money abroad. If the government can take steps and cut a significant amount of money from their income, then it can be used to pay for necessary public services.

Those who believe that high taxes are a bad thing have some points that should not be overlooked.

One possible reason is that there are many individuals who have a big family with a tight income. So, if the administration takes a large percentage of money from their income, it will be a great trouble for them to support their family. They can’t ensure their children’s education, and it will even be hard to afford their accommodation.

In conclusion, I believe that the government should maintain a balance in taking taxes and apply some fixed rules. Moreover, they have to take steps against money laundering or smuggling. By keeping a proper balance, they can ensure public facilities and the country’s development.

Word Count: 270

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Overall Band Score

(+/- 0.5)

Vocabulary Complexity:
C1 - Intricate
Strive to incorporate even richer and more precise language.

Grammar Mistakes: N/A

Vocabulary Repetition:

their: 7

money: 6

income: 5

public: 5

should: 4

facilities: 4

administration: 3

believe: 3

government: 3

Try using synonyms for the above words

Task Response

The essay addresses the main parts of the prompt by discussing both views on taxation and providing an opinion. However, the ideas presented, while relevant, lack clarity and sufficient development. For example, the argument about business tycoons in Bangladesh, while relevant, could be strengthened with more specific details about how this money could improve public services. Similarly, the discussion of families with tight incomes could benefit from more concrete examples of the challenges they face. To improve, focus on providing more specific examples and elaborating on the potential consequences of each viewpoint. Also, ensure a clearer and more consistent focus throughout the essay.

Coherence & Cohesion

The essay is generally well-organized with a clear structure, including an introduction, body paragraphs discussing both sides of the argument, and a conclusion. Transitions between paragraphs are present but could be smoother to enhance the flow of ideas. For instance, the transition between the second and third paragraphs could be improved to better connect the opposing viewpoints. While the essay is easy to follow, enhancing the linking words and phrases would further strengthen the coherence.

Lexical Resource

The essay demonstrates a sufficient range of vocabulary to express ideas clearly. However, there's room to incorporate more sophisticated and precise language to elevate the writing. For example, instead of using 'take a huge percentage,' consider using more nuanced phrases like 'levy a substantial proportion' or 'allocate a significant fraction.' Expanding the range of vocabulary and using more specific word choices would enhance the essay's lexical resource. Pay attention to vocabulary repetition to improve the overall score.

Grammatical Range & Accuracy

The essay demonstrates a wide range of grammatical structures with full flexibility and control. There are virtually no grammatical errors or phrasing issues, indicating a strong command of the English language. Punctuation and grammar are used appropriately throughout the essay, contributing to its overall clarity and readability.

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