Opinion

Band 5+: Studies show that many criminals have a low level of education. For this reason, people believe that the best way to reduce crime is to educate people in prison so they can get a job when leave prison. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

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A research found that a lot of criminals have poor academic knowledge. Some people believe that to decline crime government should educate criminals in prison. As a result, when they will be free can get a job. This essay will discuss this topic and give my own opinion. In my opinion, i completely agree that an education system in prison can help reduce crimes.

In the one hand, nowadays crimes such as theft and robboery have been increasing in many countries. It is increasing because of unemployment and lake of education. However, in a competitive market, it too hard too find a job without any skill. Therefors, if criminals develp skill while they are in prison, they might find jobs easily after leaveing prison. Moreover, with jobs and educational knowledge, they will not be involved in crime againg, which can reduce the crime rate of the nation forever. For example, in some African countries, a lot of teenagers are involved in crime because of poor education quality.

On the other hand, This approach can help decrease crime, but government needs to spend a big amount of money in this project. In prison, the government spend money on food, accommodaton and medication of presoners, which comes from the national fund. Besides these if the government add the facilities of education, it might increase the total cost.

As a result, the budget may have declined for other projects . Furthermore, some developing countries will face many difficulties to implementing this system.

In conclusion, although teaching prisoner can reduce crime and develop the nation, government aslo need to consider about the cost.I strongly believe that it is the best way to solve the crime problem permanently.

Word Count: 283

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Overall Band Score

(+/- 0.5)

Vocabulary Complexity:
C1 - Intricate
Strive to incorporate even richer and more precise language.

Grammar Mistakes: N/A

Vocabulary Repetition:

crime: 7

government: 5

prison: 5

education: 4

criminals: 3

reduce: 3

countries: 3

Try using synonyms for the above words

Task Response

The essay addresses the main parts of the prompt and presents a position. However, the ideas lack clarity and sufficient development. To improve, focus on providing more specific examples and elaborating on the reasoning behind your arguments. Also, ensure a clearer connection between the lack of education and the propensity to commit crimes.

Coherence & Cohesion

The essay demonstrates some organization, but the progression of ideas is not always clear. The introduction and conclusion are present, but the connection between ideas within paragraphs could be strengthened. Use clearer topic sentences and transitions to guide the reader. For example, in the second paragraph, explicitly link the rise in theft and robbery to unemployment and lack of education. In the third paragraph, clarify the connection between the cost of educating prisoners and the potential decline in budgets for other projects. Improve the logical flow by ensuring each sentence directly supports the main idea of the paragraph.

Lexical Resource

The vocabulary used is somewhat limited and contains inaccuracies. There are instances of inappropriate word choice (e.g., "robboery," "lake of education," "leaveing prison," "againg," "aslo"). Expand your vocabulary and focus on using more precise and varied language. Use a thesaurus to find synonyms and pay attention to collocations. Proofread carefully to avoid spelling errors. Boost vocabulary complexity to elevate the overall score.

Grammatical Range & Accuracy

The essay contains frequent grammatical errors that impede understanding. Errors include incorrect verb tenses (e.g., "when they will be free can get a job"), subject-verb agreement issues, incorrect article usage, and awkward sentence structures. Focus on improving your understanding of basic grammar rules and sentence construction. Practice writing simple sentences and gradually incorporate more complex structures as your accuracy improves. Pay close attention to punctuation, especially commas and periods.

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Band 5+: Studies show that many criminals have a low level of education. For this reason, people believe that the best way to reduce crime is to educate people in prison so they can get a job when leave prison. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

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Overall Band Score

Task Response

Coherence & Cohesion

Lexical Resource

Grammatical Range & Accuracy

Essays On The Same Topic:

Studies show that many criminals have a low level of education. For this reason, people believe that the best way to reduce crime is to educate people in prison so they can get a job when leave prison. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

Studies show that many criminals have a low level of education. For this reason, people believe that the best way to reduce crime is to educate people in prison so they can get a job when leave prison. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

Studies show that many criminals have a low level of education. For this reason, people believe that the best way to reduce crime is to educate people in prison so they can get a job when leave prison. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

Studies show that many criminals have a low level of education. For this reason, people believe that the best way to reduce crime is to educate people in prison so they can get a job when leave prison. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

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Task 2 It is impossible to help all people in the world, so the government should only focus on people in their own countries. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

Today more and more people are using mobile phones and computers. Thus, people are losing the ability to communicate face to face. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

Check Your Own Essay On This Topic?

Generate A Band-9 Sample With Your Idea?

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Task Response

Coherence & Cohesion

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