Opinion

Band 5+: there are several social consequences to housing shortages in cities, and only the government can solve this problem.Do you agree or disagree

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A large number of countries have a serious problem of a shortage housing. Many people have opinion that only government can solve that issue. I disagree with that because housing problem can be solved by financial investment from private companies and developers.

Private developers have more abilities to build housing in a short period of time and more efficiently. Therefore they play an important role for solving problems with housing in countries. As private companies have their own financial abilities they do not rely on government budget which can be limited due to the financial support for education, medicine and military defence. Moreover, if private companies compete with each other in the same market, the number of housing will increase significantly.

The best option for government for tackling this problem is to regulate the housing market rather than support financially every construction project. As government is responsible for providing a healthcare, education and public infrastructure for its residents, there is a lack of finance. Consequently, the government can encourage private investments and reduce taxes for housing. Therefore, cooperation between public and government will help to reduce the problem with housing for many citizens.

In conclusion, I do not agree with the statement that only government can provide housing. Private developers can provide investment so that the housing market has more offers for residents, while the government will regulate the market.

Word Count: 230

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Overall Band Score

5.5

(+/- 0.5)

Vocabulary Complexity:
C2 - Complex
Continue to challenge and refine your language choices.

Grammar Mistakes: N/A

Vocabulary Repetition:

housing: 10

government: 8

private: 5

problem: 4

market: 4

financial: 3

companies: 3

Try using synonyms for the above words

Task Response

The essay addresses the prompt and presents a clear position against the statement. It provides relevant ideas, such as the role of private developers and government regulation, but the development could be more precise and detailed. For instance, the argument about private companies' efficiency and financial independence is mentioned but not fully elaborated. Additionally, the phrase 'cooperation between public and government' is unclear; it should be 'private sector and government.' To improve, ensure each paragraph has a clear topic sentence and expand on how private investment and government regulation can work together effectively. The essay falls short of the required 250 words.

Coherence & Cohesion

The essay has a clear structure with an introduction, two body paragraphs, and a conclusion. However, the flow is sometimes disrupted by awkward phrasing and unclear pronoun references (e.g., 'they' in paragraph 2). The use of cohesive devices is basic, and some ideas could be more logically connected. To improve, use a wider range of linking words and ensure each paragraph has a clear central topic with smooth transitions.

Lexical Resource

The essay uses some appropriate vocabulary related to the topic (e.g., 'shortage of housing', 'private developers', 'financial investment'). However, there are instances of imprecise word choice (e.g., 'abilities' instead of 'capacity' or 'resources') and repetition (e.g., 'housing' appears frequently). To improve, expand your range of vocabulary and use more precise and varied terms. Also, pay attention to collocations (e.g., 'tackle the problem' instead of 'tackling this problem'). Pay attention to vocabulary repetition to improve the overall score.

Grammatical Range & Accuracy

The essay contains several grammatical errors and awkward phrasings that affect clarity. For example, 'a shortage housing' should be 'a shortage of housing', and 'have opinion' should be 'have the opinion'. There are also issues with subject-verb agreement and article usage. To improve, review basic grammar rules, especially articles, prepositions, and sentence structure. Practice writing more complex sentences with accurate grammar to enhance clarity and accuracy.

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