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Band 5+: You should spend about 40 minutes on this task. Write about the following topic: In many countries, primary and secondary schools close for two months or more in the summer holidays. What is the value of long school holidays? What are the arguments in favour of shorter school holidays?

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Note: Both the topic and the essay were created by one of our users.

The given statement illustrates that, in many nations, elementry and high schools close for two months in summer vacations. There are different values of long school holidays and different arguments in the favour of shorter school holidays.

There are several values of long school vacations. During studies students face high pressure. It may affect on their mental health because of hectic school routine. A long holidays will give them relaxation from studies and help them to improve their mental health. Similarly, long vacations can help them to build strong relations with their friends and families. Their bonding with their families will be strong in that time period. They can spend more time with their families and enjoy taking meals togather, also they can make a lot of memories during holidays. Another strong value of long vacation is that, they can face life challenges and gain more experience through them, real time experiences that school and studies can not provide them.

There are some arguments that are in favour of shorter school holidays. Biggest argument is that they can learn contineously and make progress in their studies. A long gap may affect on their studies and after long break they may not be able to focus properly, so shorter break will be benficial for those who want to gain more information and to achieve highest grades in their studies.

In conclusion, both have their pros and cons. Long holidays will be benificial for those who can experience life outside the classrom, and the shorter vacations for those who want to gain more knowldge and sucessful grades in their studies.

Word Count: 268

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Overall Band Score

5.5

(+/- 0.5)

Vocabulary Complexity:
B2 - Upper Intermediate
Opt for even more advanced words when appropriate.

Grammar Mistakes: N/A

Vocabulary Repetition:

their: 11

school: 6

studies: 6

holidays: 5

vacations: 4

shorter: 4

strong: 3

families: 3

those: 3

Try using synonyms for the above words

Task Response

The essay addresses the prompt, presenting a clear position and relevant ideas. However, some ideas lack sufficient development and precision. To improve, focus on providing more specific examples and detailed explanations to support your arguments. Also, ensure a consistent level of focus and depth throughout the essay.

Coherence & Cohesion

The essay demonstrates an attempt to organize ideas into paragraphs, but the connections between sentences and paragraphs could be strengthened. Transitions are somewhat basic, and the flow of ideas is not always seamless. Consider using a wider range of cohesive devices to improve the overall coherence. For example, in the second paragraph, elaborating further on how long holidays specifically improve mental health and build stronger family relationships would enhance the paragraph's impact. In the third paragraph, providing specific examples of how a long gap affects studies could make the argument more convincing.

Lexical Resource

The essay uses a range of vocabulary, but some word choices are not entirely accurate or natural. For instance, 'elementry' should be 'elementary,' and 'contineously' should be 'continuously.' There are also instances where more precise vocabulary could enhance the impact, such as replacing 'benficial' with 'beneficial' or 'advantageous.' Focus on improving the accuracy and appropriateness of your word choices to elevate the lexical quality of your writing. Pay attention to vocabulary repetition to improve the overall score.

Grammatical Range & Accuracy

The essay contains a mix of simple and complex sentence structures, but grammatical errors are frequent and sometimes impede understanding. Common errors include incorrect verb tenses ('affect on' should be 'affect'), subject-verb agreement issues, and awkward phrasing. For example, 'A long holidays will give them relaxation' should be 'Long holidays will give them relaxation' or 'Long holidays give them relaxation'. Pay close attention to correcting these errors and aim for greater accuracy in your grammatical constructions. Review basic grammar rules and proofread carefully to minimize mistakes.

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