Band 5+: You live in a rented apartment. Recently, there has been a problem with the heating system in your building, and it is still not fixed despite your previous phone calls. Write a letter to your landlord, Mr. Thompson. In your letter: Describe the problem with the heating. Explain how this is affecting your daily life. State what action you expect the landlord to take and by when.

The letter addresses all three bullet points, but the development of these points is somewhat limited and the tone is occasionally inconsistent. While the student explains when the problem was noticed, how it affects them (health issues), and what they want (fix it or refund), the explanations lack the depth and professional polish expected in a formal letter to a landlord. To improve, focus on the following: - **Tone and Register:** Since this is a formal letter to a landlord, avoid overly emotional or blunt phrasing (e.g., 'I told you perfectly'). Instead, use polite but firm language such as 'As we discussed during our initial meeting...' or 'I would appreciate it if you could...'. - **Detail and Expansion:** Expand on the impact of the problem. Instead of just mentioning a medical condition, explain how the cold temperature specifically exacerbates the situation. - **Grammar and Vocabulary:** Work on sentence structure and word choice. For example, 'look for a beer apartment' is a significant error (likely meaning 'better') and 'made me to leave' should be 'made me leave'. Ensuring accuracy in these areas will help convey the seriousness of the complaint more effectively.

The letter follows a logical progression by addressing the three bullet points in order. However, the transitions between ideas are somewhat abrupt. To improve, use more sophisticated cohesive devices (e.g., 'Consequently,' 'Due to this situation,' or 'In light of these circumstances') to link your personal health issues to the need for immediate action. Additionally, ensure that each paragraph has a clear, singular focus to improve the flow of information.

The vocabulary used is functional but quite basic and repetitive (e.g., using 'heating system' and 'problem' multiple times). There are also some word choice errors, such as 'beer apartment' instead of 'better apartment' and 'leave the place that I used to leave' which is confusing. To reach a higher band, try to use more precise synonyms. For example, instead of 'fix,' use 'repair' or 'rectify'; instead of 'look for,' use 'seek' or 'locate'.

There are frequent grammatical errors that occasionally hinder the reader's understanding. Issues include missing articles (e.g., 'writing complaint' should be 'writing a complaint'), incorrect preposition usage, and awkward sentence structures (e.g., 'made me to leave'). There are also punctuation errors, such as using a period after 'Dear sir' instead of a comma. Focus on mastering complex sentence structures and ensuring subject-verb agreement and correct article usage to improve clarity.